By: Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012
I moved this past weekend and, oh my goodness, I vehemently recommend never moving in the summertime. Down on the loading dock in the new place, it felt like I was on the Sahara; fortunately, there were about eight of us so we were out of there in under an hour. While my buddy and I were waiting for the U-Haul truck, somebody posited the idea of moving during the winter, and I couldn’t help but shudder at the thought of my nice clothes and furniture being covered in slush. Yikes!
6 games remain in a highly competitive season of the SPNHL, and the playoff picture is starting to come together like an overpriced puzzle; teams are making late pushes to gain home-ice advantage for the playoffs, while some teams are looking to scrap their way into a playoff spot in the highly competitive Western conference. Detroit and San Jose have remained stalwarts all season, while Edmonton and Washington are starting to gain momentum at the perfect time. Meanwhile, Vegas, Seattle, and Colorado are only separated by five points as they fight for the final two spots in the West, while Toronto and Montreal are looking to fix their problems in time for the quest for the Stanley Cup. Better luck next season, Philadelphia!
Call me Jakey Lahey as I’m practically joined at the hip with Randy these days (I could be Gerald Broflovski or Sharon Marsh and keep with the South Park theme, but I like Trailer Park Boys more), and we’ll keep with the same formula! Randall will cover the Eastern conference, and I’ll take care of the West. We’ll recap overall and weekly performances, analyze strengths and weaknesses, and highlight team’s most valuable players and unsung heroes (since Hxrdie refuses to do it, gutless bastard).
I’m getting off topic. Let’s start with the Eastern conference!
EASTERN CONFERENCE
- Detroit Red Wings.
Last Week Rank: 1.
Overall Record: 27-9-3.
Weekly Record: 6-3-0.
Strength: Offense.
Weakness: Chad’s party presence.
MVP: KyleJ83, leads defense in scoring.
Unsung Hero: xquizT-kys, 14GP, 13pts, +25 on defense.
A slight off week for the Wings; their availability wasn’t too hot as they had to use some TC/ECU players in 2 of 3 nights. Not enough to drop them out of the number 1 spot though. They beat the Sharks for the first time this season in a nice comeback W, being down 4-2 and managing to win 5-4 with 10 seconds left in the game. They did have a disappointing loss to Seattle, a team they typically wouldn’t lose to.
KyleJ gets the MVP of the team this week, being a top defender for this team and leading the league in points for defense, this team would be only half as good without him back there on RD. Quiztky has had a nice quiet solid season for the wings and played a lot for them this week, he signed up as RW but played majority of his games this season on D and doing it well. Quiz deserves a nice pat on the back for filling the necessary holes for this Red Wings team when called upon and being successful. This Red Wings team needs 5pts in the last 6 games to clinch the top spot in the East, If Washington wins their last 6 games of the season.
- Washington Capitals
Last Week Rank: 3.
Overall Record: 24-14-1.
Weekly Record: 7-1-1.
Strength: Offense.
Weakness: Goaltending.
MVP: Wardo_05, 4.2ppg on forward, 2.0ppg on Defense.
Unsung Hero: Dustin, 10GP on forward, 10GP on defense.
The Capitals move up to the 2nd spot in the power rankings this week after going 7-1-1 (with one of those losses being an FFL) and overtaking Toronto for 2nd spot in the East as well by 2pts. This Capitals team came out of the gate late, but are storming their way up to the top and showing they are a force to be reckoned with. In the past 3 weeks (excluding FF games) they are averaging a 5.47 goals per game which is at the same pace as the other top teams in the league.
They still need to work on their defense and goaltending though, all 3 of Washingtons main goalies are averaging a 71.39SV% with the best goalie having a 73.53SV%. If they can start to shut down other teams’ offense and get some more saves these guys will be a serious threat in the playoffs. Having Dustin and Wardo both as versatile players on both F and D seem to have improved this teams success.
- Toronto Maple Leafs
Last Week Rank: 2.
Overall Record: 22-14-3
Weekly Record: 3-6-0.
Strength: PK.
Weakness: Offense.
MVP: Uberpwned6969 14GP, 14pts.
Unsung Hero: Monokuuu, 21GP, +6.52 GV:TK.
Terrible week for the Leafs as they drop down to 3rd in the East and lose 6 of 9 games. Availability looks to be the main contributor to the lack of success as Sorokin only played 5 games in nets this week and Bufford didn’t play 1 game between the pipes. This team’s success was driven by being able to protect their goalies and keep games close enough so that the offense only needed 3-4 goals to win, unfortunately none of those things seemed to come together for these guys this week. Good news for this team is that they won’t fall past 3rd in the standings since Montreal is too far back, but they have to start getting playoff ready now if they want to be able to compete with Washington or Detroit.
Uberpwned gets the MVP this week, contributing to this squads offense while still trying to support the goaltending. Unsung hero is Monokuuu, who has been a solid stay at home dman for these guys all season and limiting his turnovers.
- Montreal Canadiens.
Last Week Rank: 4.
Overall Record: 17-22-0.
Weekly Record: 5-4-0.
Strength: Offense.
Weakness: Defense, PK.
MVP: BrazGhostt 19GP, 76.92SV%.
Unsung Hero: ChiefTrout 13GP, 10pts on D.
These Canadiens grabbed 3 FFW’s this week which means they actually went 2-4-0. Their availability has been all over the place, but they still are lacking on the defensive side of the puck. If Philadelphia didn’t crumble after week 2 I don’t know if these guys would be sitting in a playoff spot or not. Brazghostt is facing 15+ shots a game and keeping these guys close every time he is in nets, he needs more support and for the defense to keep chances to the outside and not in the middle or across the crease.
ChiefTrout is another player who signed up to play forward but has been asked to play D for this squad more often than not. He’s been doing solid and only is a -2 on a losing squad.
- Philadelphia Flyers
Last Week Rank: 5
Overall Record: 8-31-0
Weekly Record: 0-9-0.
Strength: Getting the jump on golf season.
Weakness: FF, FF, FF.
MVP: El Rookie, for continuing to not have a quitting attitude as well as being their best player.
Unsung Hero: Blackfire 4GP, 8pts.
This team played 1 game this week against Edmonton and lost 9-6. The last game they played was against Edmonton as well and lost 9-0. Maybe try showing up against another team other than Edmonton? Might have better luck grabbing a W. This is the week for these guys to potentially play the upset card, would love to see it happen.
El_rookie is still involved trying to get the games played but isn’t having much luck, hats off to Blackfire as well for showing up even though it ends up being an FF anyways.
WESTERN CONFERENCE
1. San Jose Sharks.
Last Week’s Ranking: 1.
Overall Record: 35-4-0.
Weekly Record: 8-1-0.
Strength: Offense (196 goals, most in the league).
Weakness: I got nothing; pressure to tie the record for most wins in 45 games?
MVP: Bartlett-67 (leads league in games played at forward with 36 and assists with 88).
Unsung Hero: Philmorin (9 games in net with 8 wins, and 12 games at D with a +27 rating).
It’s going to be incredibly difficult to contend with these Sharks as they are on a roll into the playoffs; with 1 loss in their past 2 weeks, San Jose remains the team to beat due to their nuclear firepower from all positions on the ice. NoScxpe96 and Hughsy28- are two tremendously talented defenders, with the former continuing his Norris caliber season with 37 points (2nd most at the position). mrlolchico13 has filled the void in net left by skillz, and is undefeated with his new team while possessing a 0.833 SV% and a sub-2 GAA. John_Dean_16 has slotted in perfectly between Randymarsh2012 (second in the goal scoring race with 65) and Bartlett-67, as he has a 4 PPG with an impressive 53.33% faceoff win percentage.
Shoutout to Philmorin, as he has been with the Sharks all season long and has been a consistent producer on defense and reliable in net. You don’t stay on the best team in the league if you aren’t a good hand to have around, and this team has plenty of good hands that will guide them to a deep playoff run.
2. Edmonton Oilers.
Last Week’s Ranking: 2.
Overall Record: 24-12-3.
Weekly Record: 8-1-0.
Strength: Offense (158 goals for, third most in the league).
Weakness: Penalty Kill (74.5%, fourth lowest in the league).
MVP: xBeanZy- (78 points in 22 games played, and leads the team with a +57 rating).
Unsung Hero: Ande91- (2 PPG in 16 games at forward, 1.3 PPG in 13 games at D).
This is the team we have been waiting for all season; despite one blemish on their record, the Oilers had a perfect week as we start to see the team become more available. Semple19’s arrival has solidified the forward core, and has 29 goals in 13 games played for Edmonton, while leading the team with 3.8 PPG. SomeoneStopMePls and uStooPiiD’s offensive production at defense continues to be among the league’s best, with both players in the top 8 for PPG at defense, while Coffey-lidstrom remains a reliable hand. With Sniiiider and BejimoSzn as RW options for xBeanZy- and Semple, Edmonton can roll any line they want and dominate these playoffs.
Along with XxGrahame_47xX, Ande91- has been a crucial part of the Oilers squad all season, living up to his reputation as one of the league’s best two way players. Playing in all but 10 of their games, Ande has excelled and kept Edmonton in contention through tough times; now, he will be a part of a loaded Oilers squad looking to win the Stanley Cup.
3. Colorado Avalanche.
Last Week’s Ranking: 5.
Overall Record: 11-22-6.
Weekly Record: 3-3-3.
Strength: Scrappiness (6 overtime losses; this team knows how to work).
Weakness: Defense (154 goals against, most in the league).
MVP: cpenn4204 (38 points in 16 games played, leads the team with 22 goals).
Unsung Hero: Beeper_tha_1st_a (14 games played at D, another Colorado lifer).
Many questioned SA_Pliskin’s decision to bring zercylol and iZincyi into the fold in Colorado, sending off two talented and reliable players in Tommy and Benji for them. However, their arrival has helped rejuvenate the Avalanche, who jumped into a playoff spot after a respectable week. The two have combined for 19 goals and 38 points since their arrival, and have become stellar linemates for cpenn4204, forming an effective scoring trio. With their offense solidified, the Avalanche need to close the revolving door of defenders and goaltenders and settle on permanent pairings; Pliskin could stick between the pipes and make a reliable tandem with FxtDino-, meanwhile he could leave defensive duties in the hands of Gooberdude99 and Beeper_tha_1st_a .
Beeper has been there from the start and has the most points per game of any active Avalanche defender; he’s also one to keep your head up for when you’re on the ice, as he has racked up 102 hits in 14 games played at D. This scrappiness and tenacity at defense could give Colorado the spark they need to hold onto their spot in a tight playoff race.
4. Seattle Kraken.
Last Week’s Ranking: 4.
Overall Record: 15-22-2.
Weekly Record: 3-6-0.
Strength: Penalty Kill (77.4%, third highest in the league).
Weakness: Powerplay (19.7% conversion, third lowest in the league).
MVP: Blade0Muffin (430 shots against in 28 games played, averaging 15 shots against and still has under 4 GAA).
Unsung Hero: NowYoDead (26 games played, 28 points, and justifying his first round selection).
These guys beat us twice last week; don’t let their record fool you, this is a good team (either that or we suck, a highly probable option) that just had an off week. They still have a reliable defense pairing in NowYoDead and Teamrun420, and with an alternate of Damorien, they can hold their ground in front of Blade0Muffin, who is making a late run for a Vezina nomination (just look at the stats above and talk to ProdigyToLegend). Meanwhile, Spelliscy_21 and iearntofly continue to be reliable support to FreezeMothaSucka; his 31 games played lead the team and his 72 points have surpassed everyone’s expectations while keeping the Kraken competitive.
NowYoDead drew a lot of heat when he was selected at the end of the first round this season, but has quietly had a great season at the blue line and has emerged as one of the more underrated defenders in the league. Seattle has a point over Vegas in a tight playoff race, and are determined to keep that spot.
5. Vegas Golden Knights.
Last Week’s Ranking: 3.
Overall Record: 12-24-3.
Weekly Record: 2-7-0.
Strength: Optimism and Proximity (they’re still in the thick of it and fighting for a playoff spot).
Weakness: Defense (152 goals against, second highest in the league).
MVP: Shock_r (30 games played since taking over as GM; 17 in net, 7 at forward, and 6 at defense).
Unsung Hero: ThaFoSix (172 hits in 25 games for the Knights; the ol’ heart and soul!).
The Golden Knights had a disastrous week, going 2-7 and falling out of their playoff spot; fortunately, as noted above, they’re only one point back and have the talent to rebound quickly. Shock_r is a reliable, fringe starting goaltender (he can be shaky at times, I played with him for two months and still have nightmares) and having acquired Wheelchairdevon8 for goaltending help gives him a solid option for when he needs a night off. Defensively, ThaFoSix still carries the Vegas flag, and with partners in vVxsion and xshepxrd (another criminally underrated defender), they can hold their own and help claw back into a playoff spot. Offensively, it seems like MazelTovMalkin and Sauc—y will be the parts that complete the Knights’ top line with FatSolhouette, who leads the team with a lowly 15 points.
Hopefully their offense can pick things up this week, and maybe control the puck a bit more to take the pressure off a defensive and goaltending core that have underachieved this season. In the meantime, give ThaFoSix the captaincy and let him rally the troops as they fight Seattle for that last spot.
Yeah, this article is a few days late, but I’ve been busy and moving and such. GET OVER IT. Nonetheless, with 6 games left in the season, the East is all but decided but the 3rd and 4th spot in the West is still anybody’s game; will the Avalanche continue to do damage as they climb the standings? Will the Kraken stop their slide and hold onto the fourth playoff spot in the conference? Will the Golden Knights rebound and secure the final playoff spot? Meanwhile, Detroit and Montreal are preparing for their series as Reapz and chadkillz meet in the first round of the playoffs for the second season in a row, and the Leafs and Capitals are preparing for what should (hopefully) be the most competitive series of the first round.
Randall, you’ve outdone yourself again with the “unsung heroes” concept, which Hxrdie said he was going to do but dropped the ball on (too busy leading the league in points, I guess). A big thank you to him for his coverage of the Eastern conference, and as always, a special shoutout to him, cuban1616, and Pliskin for their job on the SPNHL Podcast, available every Monday wherever you get your podcasts.
If you like the intro music, it’s “Bulls on Parade” by Rage Against the Machine. You should go listen to all 4 of their excellent studio albums.
Good luck to everybody this week, we’ll see you on the ice!
SPNHL Media Correspondents Extraordinaire,
Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012