Tag: Playoffs

SPNHL Season 44: Weekly Review/PowerRankings – “It All Comes Down to This”

By: Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012

Hockey season is coming up, and I still think it’s ridiculous that in order to watch in-market games, you either need a VPN or you need a cable subscription. Like, what year is it? Yeah, I could continue to use my streaming site (not naming it here, momma didn’t raise no snitch), but I wouldn’t mind watching it on a big screen and continuing to use my laptop for other things. Before you try and sell me on an IPTV, keep in mind that PistolPete tried doing it for years. Perhaps I should give it a shot? I’m stubborn and a traditionalist, so we’ll see. Maybe I’ll sign up for TSN Direct and Sportsnet Now and diversify my sports intake. If only I get ESPN 8: “The Ocho”…

Much like the name of the excellent Bane debut record, it all comes down to this; two conference champions prepare to engage in a grueling, seven game series in order to crown the winner of the Stanley Cup and the little of the best team in Season 44 of the Sony Playstation National Hockey League. Four teams engaged in the conference finals over the past week, but only two came out victorious; the teams that met the unfortunate fate of defeat were the Edmonton Oilers and the Detroit Red Wings. I’d like to congratulate both teams on a hell of a season and wish them nothing but the best as they look forward to next season, as there is no shame in falling short to the Stanley Cup finalists. Speaking of them, let’s get reacquainted. 

In the Western Conference, we have the San Jose Sharks. This powerhouse has sat atop of the league all season long, matching the record for the most wins in 45 games with 41. This is a team that was never complacent and kept improving throughout the season, making trades to bring in the best players available and have them slot into the lineup with ease. After disposing of the Vegas Golden Knights in the first round of the playoffs, they faced an immensely talented Edmonton Oilers team in the conference finals, and pulled off the win a tight 6 game series.

Out of the Eastern Conference, we have the Washington Capitals. The Capitals were predicted to be one of the best teams out of the gate, but didn’t really click until later on in the season. They found themselves struggling, but trades for key players turned their season around. They emerged as the second seed in the East, and disposed of the Toronto Maple Leafs in 5 games in the first round. Many predicted the Red Wings to defeat the Capitals, but Washington was able to pull off the upset and advance to the Stanley Cup Finals in 6 games. 

Congratulations to the San Jose Sharks and the Washington Capitals for advancing to the Stanley Cup Finals, and playing some excellent hockey for the past two months. Now, you’ve got one week left and seven games to show that you are the best team in the league. Not only is randymarsh2012 playing in this series, he’s also gonna be breaking it down for us, highlighting each team’s strengths and weaknesses, recapping predictions, and a whole bunch of other things he has gone above and beyond to do for your reading pleasure. Isn’t he just the best?

Let’s start by taking a closer look at the previous round!

Round 2 Review

San Jose Sharks advance to the Cup final beating the Edmonton Oilers in 6 games.

Game 1 – Edmonton grabbed an early 1-0 lead, but the Sharks came back in the 3rd to tie and force overtime and won by a score of 3-2.

Game 2 – Sharks grabbed the lead early in the 2nd but they couldn’t hold on as the Oilers put up 3 goals in the 3rd to win 3-1 and tie the series at 1-1.

Game 3 – Oilers and Sharks were tied 1-1 after the first period, then the Sharks grabbed the lead to make it 2-1 after the 2nd period. In the 3rd, Edmonton took a few costly penalties that the Sharks capitalized on to win the game 5-2.

Game 4 – This game was a nail biter heading into the 3rd tied 1-1, then the sharks broke the tie to make it 2-1 and shortly after Clake had a lag out which forced Edmonton to take a PIM and restart the game with 6 minutes left in the 3rd. The Sharks took advantage of that PP and scored and didn’t look back as the next 3 shots also went in causing the score to be run up to 6-1 in favour of the Sharks and to take a commanding 3-1 series lead.

Game 5 – Edmonton wasn’t going to roll over just yet, they made a goaltending change which put SomeoneStopMepls in net with Bejimoszn taking over right wing. The Oilers got a late 1st period breakaway and scored, and then it was strong Edmonton defense and goaltending that sealed the deal giving the Sharks their 1st scoreless game of the season and winning 1-0, bringing the series to 3-2 in favor of the Sharks.

Game 6 – San Jose’s offense came out of the gate early and had a 3-1 lead after the 1st period. Halfway through the 3rd period, the  Sharks scored their 5th goal of the game to make it 5-1 and seemed to be the dagger to end Edmonton’s playoff dreams. But Beanzy, Semple, and Bejimo weren’t ready to call it quits yet. They stormed back over the next 8 minutes and scored 4 goals to tie the game at 5-5. They had the Sharks on their heels hard and panic was starting to set in, but with 30 seconds left in the game Hughsy fired a one timer from the point far side to put the sharks up by 1. Then Noscope sealed the deal with 10 seconds remaining with an empty netter to put the Sharks into the Stanley Cup Finals.

Edmonton played strong hockey all series and despite some of the final scores, kept games very close and very competitive throughout the entire series. A couple of good bounces and the series could’ve ended in their favor. Great series and great season for these Oilers. They played a team that has only lost 6 times so far this entire season and they were the ones that handed them 3 of those losses.

RandyMarsh’s gutless Sharks move on to the SCF and it is his first appearance in a cup final since riding the pine back in S27, where he was carried to a cup win.

The Washington Capitals pull off the upset and beat the Detroit Red Wings in 6 games.

Game 1 – Washington made a late push in the 3rd to try and tie the game but was unsuccessful. Red Wings take game 1 with a score of 4-3 to go up in the series 1-0 to start. 

Game 2 – Washington scores 6 goals on 11 shots and takes game 2 with a commanding score of 6-1.

Game 3 – Washington continues to pick apart Vandoos as they score 5 goals on 9 shots and win 5-2 to take a 2-1 series lead.

Game 4 – Washington wins 2-1 to take a commanding series lead of 3-1.

Game 5 – Detroit wins 2-1 to force a game 6.

Game 6 – Washington beats Detroit 2-1 in a nail biter and wins the series.

Detroit didn’t get the goaltending they needed in games 2 + 3 (although Fluri said he did great in the latter three games), and Washington did a good job of shutting down Hardie in this series. Washington is showing they have the defensive ability that some people (myself included) doubted they had and are now making their way to the SCF to face a hungry Sharks team.

Detroit had a hell of a season and are more than likely very disappointed in the outcome, but it took some serious strong hockey by Washington to take these Red Wings down. Congrats to Chad on building yet another stellar team and competing hard.

Washington showed this series that they are a true force to be reckoned with and that the Sharks better be ready because they are coming for the cup and nothing less.

Eggman, start doing your stats. Either that, or give us play-by-play or a review of the series. EGG!

Here are the results of the 2nd round picks combined with the 1st to see who the best guesser in the playoffs is:

RankPlayerTotal
1Fluri3722
2Cpenn21
3Dirty-Dietrich19
4Hardie18
4Tommyboii18
6RandyMarsh17
6Hughsy2817
6Kidmoney17
6El_Rookie17
6FreezeMothaSucka17
11CClarke199916
11YoJonsn16
11Fishhure16
11Polar138716
15WheelChairDevon14
15ThaFoSix14

Fluri37 takes over 1st place with cpenn in a close 2nd.

Hardie and tommy laid big goose eggs both picking Edmonton and Detroit to win, dropping them to 4th.

Stanley Cup Final Preview:

San Jose Sharks (41-4-0) vs Washington Capitals (29-15-1)

Season Series: Sharks (3-1-0) Caps (1-3-0)

Potential Game 7 Matchup:

Center: John Dean vs Fluri37.

Left Wing: Barlett vs ProdigyToLegend. 

Right Wing: RandyMarsh vs Wardo_05.

Left Defense: Noscope vs Eggman.

Right Defense: Hughsy vs Dustin.

Goalie: MrlolChico/Pickle vs Goalieman/Liljxgren.

Spare/Potential G7: – TwnsPepsi vs Druwyy.

Key Points:

  • None of these players have all touched the ice at the same time in their meetings.
  • Fluri called his boss gutless the other day, so we all know RandyMarsh is living rent free in his brain.
  • Prod beat his bff Tommyboii last series so he could be going through some emotional damage.
  • Wardo was a 2nd round pick to the Sharks and was later involved in the trade that brought Hughsy and PickleTickler to San Jose, so he will be sweating his hole off so he can tell RandyMarsh to pound sand.
  • Druwyy was a Shark for a day before being traded to Washington.
  • Hughsy and John Dean have 3-peat cup champions on the line.
  • Bartlett is ass ong.

Randy: This Washington team has come together at the right time and is showing that they are primed and ready to win a cup. The top line of Fluri, Prod, and Wardo is getting the offense done while also playing solid defensive hockey. Their newfound goaltending superstar in Liljxgren is another factor in this team’s success. Dustin buying into his role as a defender for this team and doing it well is also another reason why this team has been successful these past 4 weeks.

 The Sharks have just continued to truck along and get the W’s, but they were put to the true test against Edmonton, the Sharks came out successful but showed some serious gaps in their play at times that almost cost them games in the series. They’ll be looking to clean that part of their game up for this next series.

These 2 forward groups are a very tight matchup. Both teams had 2 players in the top 6 in scoring this season and both lines have been producing good numbers so far in these playoffs. Will the chemistry between Bart, John, and Randy continue into this series? Or has Prod and Fluri found some new chem with Wardo on the right side that may be overwhelming for the Sharks?

The defensive matchup looks to be in favor of the Sharks looking at the stats so far in these playoffs. Both Shark defenders are 1 and 2 in scoring by a fair amount. But the Capital defenders have just come off playing one of the top lines in the league and limiting them to 4 goals over the final 3 games of their series. Could the strong defensive play of Washington’s defenders be more valuable in this series than the Sharks quick puck moving D-men?

Goaltending, the Sharks have had solid goaltending all season out of MrlolChico and Pickletickler, with both only having 1 loss each so far these playoffs. But Washington, who once had one of the worst goalie statistics out of all teams during the season, now has 2 goalies leading the playoffs in SV% and GAA. Will the potential Vezina winner MrlolChico show why the trophy deserves to be his? Or will late season bloomer Liljxgren continue his brick wall play and shut these Sharks down?

Forwards: Toss up, both forward lines are potent and have shown they can score.

Defense: Advantage to San Jose, more offensive ability and just as capable defensively.

Goaltending: Toss up, Washington goalies have the better numbers these playoffs, but during the season Shark goalies have gotten the numbers and wins.

RandyMarsh’s gutless pick – Washington in 5

Dirty D: Randall and the Sharks have a combined 49-6 record in the regular and playoffs, and that kind of dominance is rarely witnessed. They have paired explosive offence guided by lightning fast speed and great puck movement with impenetrable defence to create a lethal combination that only the Oilers have seem to have figured out. With a startling line consisting of three of the reigning Stanley Cup champions, this team has a championship pedigree and knows how to get it done when the time comes.

Eggman and the Capitals continued their midseason resurgence and have rode it all the way to the Stanley Cup final. This is another team that has a lot of championship success, with Eggman, Prodigy, and Fluri all having been to the promised land before. They know how to break through traps and command the slot as their own, whether it be in the offensive end or the defensive end. The defensive depth that this team has is key to their success in these playoffs.

Offensively, I have to give the edge to the San Jose Sharks. The Capitals have been fantastic offensively during these playoffs, with Fluri37 leading the way and being a frontrunner for the Conn Smythe, but Randall and Bartlett have continued their momentum from the regular season and remain in the top 3 in scoring; the Gutless One leads all players with 18 goals and 44 shots. While Fluri has some great weapons around him in Prodigy, Druwyy, and WARD0, the Sharks have John_Dean anchoring their top line and will have the better top line entering this series.

On defense, NoScxpe has been shutting down people for the Sharks all season long, and the addition of Hughsy to that line has only bolstered an already stout defence (the latter is channeling his inner Victor Hedman these playoffs). I would love to talk more statistically about the Capitals’ defensive corps, but you know Eggy and stats don’t always go well together. However, they boast an impressive core of Dustin, Druwyy, WARD0 (yeah, they’re versatile), and Mr. Egg himself. They shut us down, but I feel like they won’t be able to contend with the dangerous duo across the ice from them.

Picking up Chico to solidify the starting goaltender role was great for the Sharks, but he hasn’t played as well as this pundit has expected him to these playoffs. Fortunately, he has the best team in the league in front of him. Meanwhile, Washington’s two goalies have stepped their game up in these playoffs, especially Liljxgren, who has all but stolen the starting goaltender spot away from goalieman. I feel like he’s the go-to-guy if Washington wants to win a Stanley Cup, and out of all the goaltenders in this series, he’s the best.

Forwards: advantage – San Jose Sharks.

Defense: advantage – San Jose Sharks (by a hair).

Goaltending: advantage – Washington Capitals.

Dietrich’s dirty prediction: my heart is telling me Washington, but my mind says San Jose Sharks in 6 games.

Here are the predictions from the rest of the league:

Well, we’ve got a barnburner for you this week, folks; we’ve got two grizzled veterans leading their team to a showdown for the Stanley Cup, we’ve got two offensive dynamos guiding their team’s offense, we’ve got two defensive duos looking to shut down the opposing squadron, and we’ve got two goalies looking to prove that they are the best and backstop their team to a championship. Only one team will emerge as the 44th Stanley Cup winner in the SPNHL, as heartbreaking defeat is in store for the other (or not, it is a video game after all). Nonetheless, we’re in store for some highly competitive hockey!

Randall, best of luck to you in this series my friend, and thank you once again for doing the brunt of the work to put this article together. You’d figure that my unemployed self would have the free time to do most of the work, but our dear friend commits most of his free time and neglects his work to deliver an excellent product. Speaking of that, make sure to listen to this week’s edition of the SPNHL Podcast, where Cuban1616 and SA_Pliskin are breaking down all the happenings in the playoffs and are being joined by a very special guest, from what I hear! 

Will Randymarsh win his first cup as GM and 2nd since S27? Or will Eggman win his, like, 8th cup?

Stay Gutless SP,

Randymarsh2012 & Dirty-Dietrich

SPNHL Season 44: Playoff Preview, Round One Review / Conference Finals Preview – “Agreeing Is Overrated”

By: Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012

My partner and I visited that new IKEA that opened a couple months ago in downtown Toronto and man, it is a ZOO in there. We were looking for shoe racks, and despite having 25 in their catalogue, they had none in store. We were gonna buy some plates as well, and despite one of the associates stating they had 6 in stock, the only ones they had were “display models”, according to another associate. Hopefully they get it figured out and ensure consistent communication between staff. Although, it was fun to yell “Hej!” whenever I saw it on the back of an associate’s shirt. They had no idea what I was talking about.

Just like that, we are down from 10 teams to 4; the top 2 teams in each conference maintained the momentum that they accumulated throughout the regular season and made short work of their first round opponents on their way to a potential Stanley Cup. It was a relatively easy path, on paper, for those teams; the San Jose Sharks and Edmonton Oilers didn’t surrender a loss to their opponents, meanwhile the Detroit Red Wings and Washington Capitals were dominant in their disposal of their competitors. For the Seattle Kraken, Vegas Golden Knights, Montreal Canadiens, and my lovely Toronto Maple Leafs, nice try and better luck next season!

Now that we’ve reached the Conference Finals of season 44 of the SPNHL Playoffs, we have four dynamic teams with their own compelling stories. Will the Sharks continue their historic season and easily advance to the Finals, or will the Oilers finally realize the potential from the beginning of the season, ice their game 7 line, and take down their proverbial white whale? Will chadkillz return to the Finals for the second consecutive season with his Detroit Red Wings, or will Washington’s mid-season resurgence continue all the way to the Stanley Cup? No matter what happens, we are in for an exciting week of games!

Randy, bless his soul, did the majority of the work on this breakdown. I just got the article emailed to me and I like to put a little pizzazz and personality into it. It was a short but somewhat eventful week in SP covering this first round of playoffs; there weren’t any upsets and not many (if any) surprises, but here is a quick breakdown of how round one went, and further below is the Conference Finals preview. We’ve also got some present and past SP players to give their predictions on how these finals will go. We get by with a little help from our friends!

Round 1 Review

WESTERN CONFERENCE

San Jose Sharks beat Vegas Golden Knights in 4 games.

The Knights put up a huge battle, forcing OT in game 1of this series, but unfortunately that’s as close as they managed to get against this Sharks team. The rest of the games were easily handled by the Sharks, with the Knights quitting in game 3 being down by 7 goals.

Shoutout to Shock_r for taking over the dumpster fire that VGK was and turning them into a playoff team.

Congrats to RandyMarsh on finally winning a god damn series!

Edmonton Oilers sweep the Seattle Kraken.

The Kraken fought hard this series losing by 1 goal three times and 2 goals another but nonetheless, came up short and never could close the deal on this Oilers squad.

Semple19 led the way for the Oilers, scoring 13 points in 4 games, while Ande91 led the back-end, scoring 6 points in 2 games with only 7GV. Clake shut the door, recording all 4 wins with a 3.50GAA.

Shoutout on the hard-fought series Kraken, you put up a good fight against a very strong team.

Congrats to the Oilers squad on sweeping their opponent and moving on to the next round!

EASTERN CONFERENCE

Detroit Red Wings eliminate the Montreal Canadiens in 5 games.

Montreal got their 1 win to avoid getting swept, but it was the Red Wings who have led the East most of the season who crushed any hopes this Montreal team had for a Conference Finals appearance. The games between these two teams looked to have been fairly close (except the 2 games where these teams traded 6 goals) with game 5 being a 1-0 win for the Red Wings.

Hxrdie led the way for the Red Wings, putting up 11 points in 4 games, while Vandoos closed the door and grabbed all 4 Red Wing wins and had a 2.00GAA and 85.45SV%.

LeCupidon was still a force in this short run for the Canadiens, putting up 10 points in 3 games while BrazGhostt put up a respectable 80.00SV% and helped grab his team’s only win.

Shoutout to Montreal for putting up a good fight and keeping the games respectable against this strong Red Wings team.

Congrats to Chadkillz on beating the Reapz/Cupidon combo for the 8th straight time.

Washington Capitals start slow but finished strong against the Toronto Maple Leafs taking the series in 5 games.

Toronto looked to be in the driver’s seat finding that much needed offense in game 1 of the series winning 6-2… but the offense died after that, only scoring 3 goals in the next 3 games, and then losing game 5 by a score of 6-4.

LilChappy led the way for the Leafs scoring 9 points in 5 games, while Sorokin grabbed the only win for the Leafs in nets and put up a solid 80.00SV% over 3 games with a 2.67 GAA.

Eggman is terrible at putting stats in, but it looks as if Fluri37 and Wardo_05 were the main guys contributing to the offense for the Capitals, while Liljxgren put up a 84.62SV% in one of the Capital wins.

Congrats to the Capitals on rebounding after game 1 and taking the next 4 games from the Leafs.

Shoutout to my boy Dirty and his Leafs for a great season and competing hard with this Capitals squad.

Here are the results of the playoff predictions of the selected few who gave me their thoughts on Round 1. 

(Correct team = 3pts, Correct number of games and correct team = bonus 2pts)

RankPlayerTotal
1Hardie18
1Tommyboii18
3Fluri3716
3Cpenn16
3Fishhure16
3Polar138716
7RandyMarsh14
7Hughsy2814
7FreezeMothaSucka14
10CClarke199913
10YoJonsn13
12El_Rookie12
13Dirty-Dietrich11
13WheelChairDevon11
13Kidmoney11
13ThaFoSix11

(20pts would have been a perfectly picked round)

Fosix, Dirty D, and Kidmoney were the only players to pick their respective teams, what a bunch of MORONS!

Devon picked against his own team but was wrong in his leafs pick causing him to also be last.

Hardie and Tommy must’ve colluded in their choices because they picked that exact same, gutless pricks. Hate them for being the most right.

Now onto the Conference Finals preview!

WESTERN CONFERENCE FINALS: San Jose Sharks (41-4-0) vs Edmonton Oilers (25-16-4)

Season Series: Sharks 6-1-0, Oilers (1-5-1) (Oilers had 1 FF L).

Do not let the season series fool you, this Oilers team did not put out their best lines in the majority of games against the Sharks squad. 

The Oilers came out the first half of this season going 9-11-3 with some bad availability, then fixed their availability issue and went 16-5-1 to finish the season. 

Let’s break it down a different way this time; we will look at each team’s Game 7 lineup and what the match up looks like.

Center: John Dean vs Beanzy.

Left Wing: – Bartlett vs Semple.

Right Wing: RandyMarsh vs Bejimoszn.

Left Defense: NoScope vs Ustoopid.

Right Defense: Hughsy vs SomeoneStopmepls.

Goalie: MrlolChico vs Clake.

Spare/potential G7 player: – Twnspepsi vs Ande91.

Randy: These matchups are intense; I’m not 100% sure if this G7 lineup for Edmonton is accurate or if Ande91 gets the call for RD and SomeoneStopmepls goes up front, or if he goes in nets instead of Clake. Either way, it’s a strong lineup with great players on both sides of the ice.

As far as these forward units go, this is pretty much a wash. San Jose has had the better offensive numbers this season, but they also played more games. Bartlett, John Dean, and RandyMarsh move the puck well and find ways to score. Semple, Beanzy and Bejimo are also well-known scorers, playoff performers, and have put up great numbers in the games they played. twnspepsi and Ande91 are the other offensive threats this series has that could be in the lineup at any time.

On defense you have another close match up, as ustoopid is arguably the best breakout defensemen in the league with great offensive and defensive talent while SomeoneStopmepls is one of the guys you could argue is better. This Edmonton team has no holes on the back end. Even with Ande91 in he is still one of the better D this season and has proven it. The Sharks defensive duo in Hughsy and Noscope is just as talented as Edmonton’s. Noscope has put up great numbers this season and in playoffs, while Hughsy has won back-to-back cups playing defense and has proven he can play any position on the ice and be an effective player. (Also, Sharks have Philmorin, the best teabagging player to ever play SP, huge advantage there…. although Ustoopid has teabagged RandyMarsh religiously in the meetings they’ve had, could be an argument made there as well.)

In nets you have a MrlolChico vs Clake matchup. Clake has proven he can make big saves when called upon, but he is also known to lose focus and let a few weak ones in (which he either blames on D or internet). MrlolChico on the other hand has been nothing but consistent this season and put-up solid numbers every game, he finished the regular season with the best SV% and one of the better win-lose records. Sharks also have a weapon in PickleTickler too, if the kid is on his game, he has proven to be one of the tougher goalies to beat. When he decides he’s going to be a tool (which is 99% of the time) he just lets other teams score for his own amusement and you’ll rarely see him in his crease. Edmonton has also placed players like Bean and SomeoneStopmepls in nets this season who both are proven winning goalies, so there is that option as well with this Oilers team and putting Clake on the bench.

Forwards: toss up, could go either way.

Defense: slight edge to Edmonton.

Goalies: edge to Sharks.

RandyMarsh’s gutless prediction is Edmonton in 4. (If I’m right I look like a genius)

Dirty D: You know, I feel kind of responsible for this Oilers squad, so I’m gonna give myself a little pat on the back. It also feels like Randy copied my homework as my draft board was filled with a bunch of people he selected before I got a chance to. I’ll put my own ego aside for a bit and take a closer look at this series.

Offensively, Edmonton has an incredibly deep forward core; with speedsters on the wings in Semple and Bejimo, incredible center depth with Beanzy and Ande, and solid backup options in Sniiiider and Vossy– (who can also switch to defense). However, in a series where your backups only need to play once, it comes down to who has the best single line, and it’s pretty tough to beat Randall, Bartlett, and John_Dean, the latter of who just won a Stanley Cup this past season, which makes me give the edge to San Jose.

Defensively, despite a back-to-back cup winner in Hughsy and a Norris trophy front runner in NoScxpe, I think the Sharks are outmatched in this department, and there is only one duo that could do this: Stoopid and Smiirk. Call the latter what you will, he has proven himself to be one of the most dynamic and prolific two way defenders across any league, while I cannot disagree with what Randall said earlier in his assessment of Stoopid. In a battle of backups between Coffey and philmorin, I may need to give the edge to Coffey, and solidify Edmonton’s defensive advantage.  

I feel like Randall just tried to recreate the whole Chicago lineup/dynamic from last season, and in acquiring mrlolchico, he acquired a hell of a goalie to guide the Sharks to the Cup. Across from him, you have Mr. Clarke; one of the community’s most polarizing characters, but one thing that you cannot dispute is his talent between the pipes. The latter made his case for the Vezina this past season, while his counterpart proved to be the missing piece for a San Jose squad that didn’t have a natural goalie all season. This one was really tough, as Clarke was the backbone of the Oilers for the majority of the season, but I think Chico has the experience edge and the nerves to take this series.

Forwards: San Jose Sharks.

Defense: Edmonton Oilers (Papa Smiirk taught me what I need to know about defense).

Goalies: San Jose Sharks.

Dietrich’s dirty prediction is San Jose in 6.

EASTERN CONFERENCE FINALS: Detroit Red Wings (33-9-3) vs Washington Capitals (29-15-1).

Season Series: Wings (5-1-0) Capitals (1-5-0) (Capitals had 1 FF L).

This is another series I would not look too hard at. I checked all games and not once did these 2 teams top line one another, the only game that looked close to it was their final game against each other and Detroit won 4-3.

Washington finished the last 2 weeks strong by going 12-4-2 with 1 game being an FF Loss. While Detroit maintained their steady pace going 15-3-0 to finish the season.

May as well do another G7 comparison to see how these teams’ matchup.

Center: Hypeyy vs Fluri37.

Left Wing: – Chadkillz vs ProdigytoLegend.

Right Wing: – Hardie vs Wardo_05.

Left Defense: – Benji_Frank vs Druwwy/Eggman.

Right Defense: KyleJ83 vs Dustin.

Goalie: SgtVandoos vs Goalieman.

Spare/potential G7 player: – SelkeTommygoat vs Liljxgren.

Randy: I don’t think you could ask for more even forward lines, both teams have some serious firepower on both sides. Wardo and Hardie are both top goal scorers in SP, Fluri and Hypeyy are another solid matchup, chad and prod are great players who produce offense better than majority of players in the league. I honestly don’t know who has the better lineup up front. This series won’t be decided by these players it will most likely be decided by the back end. Detroit has the extra depth with Tommyboii who could easily be placed in for Hypeyy, but I just went with the line that played together most of the season.

KyleJ83 is by far the best defender in this series. Paired with Benji_Frank (or even possibly Hypeyy if tommyboii get slotted in at C) this Detroit blueline has an advantage over the Washington blueline. Eggman, Dustin, and Druwyy aren’t at the caliber of KyleJ, they might be on par with BenjiFrank or Hypey as far as defending goes, but I think Detroit has an advantage here with having D-men who can get the puck up the ice quick and efficiently. 

As far as goalies are concerned, I would say it’s a tossup. Goalieman can play better than he has so far this season, but on the other hand, Vandoos is having another solid playoff performance so far. Washington may attempt to play liljgrxn more as well since he seems to put up solid numbers when given the chance. Slight advantage to Detroit here in this category as well though, because Chadkillz is on this Red Wings team and is more than willing to throw the pads on to get a W if it is needed.

Forwards: Toss up, equal talent.

Defense: Advantage Detroit.

Goalies: Advantage Detroit.

Randy Marsh picks Red Wings in 6.

Dirty D: Before everything went to hell in a handbasket for the Maple Leafs, we were able to compete with both of these teams, but we knew they would eat us alive in a seven game series. Now, let’s see how these two monsters stack up against eachother in a battle reminiscent of Godzilla vs. Kong.

Offensively, these two teams are very similar; they are fast skating, puck moving teams that know how to find each other, and then the back of the net. Hypey, Hardie, and chadkillz have been together since the beginning of the season and have developed chemistry that make them arguably the most lethal line in these playoffs. While Washington has a great core of forwards such as Fluri, Prodigy, Druwyy, and more with a tremendous amount of versatility, they simply can’t match up to the top line that Detroit will ice.

I also think the Red Wings have the best defender in the series in kylej, but they don’t have the talent at the position and ability to ice a defensive pairing that can beat what the Capitals can put out. Eggman is a vet who was all but ruled out by most people, but has been able to hold his own in these playoffs, but he will still play third fiddle to Dustin and WARDO in this coming series. Beantown and Benji are good defenders to pair with kyle, but the edge, in this honest pundit’s opinion, will go to the Caps.

We’re gonna have a little goalie duel this series, as we have last season’s Conn Smythe winner in SgtVandoos against one of the league’s best tandems in goalieman and the Capitals’ secret weapon in Liljxgren. Vandoos has a 2 GAA and .855 SV% with a shutout in these playoffs thus far, meanwhile Eggman didn’t do any stats after the first two games against the Leafs so, not much to report other than Lilly is the real deal and goalieman is always reliable, and they sent us packing and kept us to 7 goals in 4 games after game 1. Vandoos is a stud, but I gotta go with a recency bias here and give the edge to Washington.

Forwards: Advantage Detroit.

Defense: Advantage Washington.

Goalies: Advantage Washington.

Dirty-Dietrich picks the Capitals in 7. 

Here are the SP former and current player picks for next series (with a few new additions):

Polar1387 did not make a pick between Edmonton and San Jose because (and I quote) ‘I refuse to pick between the boys’. Gutless!

As the Final Four prepare themselves for some of the most challenging hockey they’ve played in months (maybe years!), they must remind themselves of the game they need to play; they need to play a tight, trap based defense and use speed to capitalize on opportunities created by mistakes. Goaltenders need to be on the money, as we have forward lines who move the rock better than miners in a quarry. Lastly, team owners need to lead by example and make sure that their squads keep their composure and keep pushing forward. You’re eight wins away from a Stanley Cup, so you better give it your all.

Randall is the best, isn’t he? He basically provided us with all the numbers and the information we needed to analyze this series, and makes my job as a media correspondent incredibly easy; while I highly doubt it, I hope he has an easy time guiding his Sharks against the Oilers this week, but good luck to those two teams as well as the Capitals and the Red Wings this upcoming week! Additionally, a special shoutout, as always, to SA_Pliskin and Cuban1616 as they deliver the SPNHL Podcast on a weekly basis despite their fortunes this season. Endurance!

Good luck to everybody this upcoming week!

SPNHL Media Correspondents Extraordinaire,

Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012

SPNHL Season 44: Playoff Preview, Round One – “Playoffs in August? Huh?”

By: Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012

So, I’ve been trying to track down a PlayStation 5 for the past few weeks, and it seems impossible to find. I’ve checked GameStop, Walmart, Costco, Santa’s Workshop (they’re closed for the summer season) and more, and nobody seems to have them. I’ve been told by GameStop to check back during the third week of August, an oddly specific time, so hopefully that works. If you know of any place to get one, hit me up. Also, if you try to resell one and gouge me, then I’ll send over some friends to gouge you; this one may be a bit more physical. 

…and then there were eight. Eight teams, four from each conference, have advanced to the playoffs to vie for the most prestigious title in the SPNHL (unless you’ve seen the Discord recently, you would think that the Vezina trophy would be it). After six challenging weeks involving forfeits, blackouts, holidays, and seemingly every other obstacle in the book, the wheat has been separated from the chaff, and we have some grueling, exciting hockey in store. Unfortunately, Philadelphia’s disastrous season and Colorado’s disappointing campaign have prevented them from advancing to the playoffs. To SA_Pliskin and Cuban1616, better luck next season, and to quote Anti–Flag: “The time has come to say goodnight, the time has come to say goodbye to the old guard”.

Despite the up-and-down forfeit filled regular season, we have ourselves some good hockey lined up for these upcoming playoffs! Here is a breakdown of each 1st round matchup with comments from both RandyMarsh and Dirty D, and some extra predictions from current and former SP players. Fortunately for Dirty-D, Randys a hustler baby (woo!) and did the majority of the work for this section; the former is a lazy prick who was too busy going to vegan food festivals this past weekend. Let’s break it down and start in the Western Conference!

WESTERN CONFERENCE

San Jose Sharks (41-4-0) vs Vegas Golden Knights (15-27-3).

Season Series: Sharks (6-0-0) Vegas (0-5-1).

Series X-Factors: SJ: Bartlett–67 (158pts) VGK: ThaFoSix (191 hits).

Players to keep an eye on:

SJ: John_Dean_16, Hughsy28, Noscxpe96, RandyMarsh2012.

VGK: Shxperd, Shock_r, Sauc—y, Wheelchairdevon.

randymarsh2012: If there’s one thing I could say about this Golden Knight team, it’s that they’re gutless pricks and they don’t give you anything easy. Sharks took the season series winning all 6, but in 3 of those contests’ games were decided by one goal, and in 2 other contests Sharks won by 2 goals. Expect this Vegas team to come out hard, play tight man to man coverage, and lay the body every chance they get. If the Sharks take these guys’ lightly at all they will find themselves in a tough spot.

San Jose in 5.

Dirty-Dietrich: You have to give credit where credit is due; the Vegas Golden Knights made the playoffs after a tumultuous season. However, they must be gluttons for punishment, as they drew a first round matchup with the San Jose Sharks, a team that tied the record for the most wins in a 41 game season. Vegas has a solid back end, with reliable options on defense and goaltending, but the incredible offense and stacked lineup that the Sharks bring to the table will be too much to overcome. Maybe you should have held onto some of your decent forwards instead of trading them all away? Something to think about, Shocky.

San Jose in 4.

Fluri37: Sharks in 4.

Hughsy28: Sharks in 4.

CClarke: Sharks in 4.

YoJonsn: Sharks in 4.

WheelChairDevon: Sharks in 5 – “I’ll shutdown that gutless RandyMarsh at least one game”.

Cpenn: Sharks in 4.

KidMoney: Sharks in 4.

Fishhure: Sharks in 4.

Polar1387: Sharks in 4.

El_Rookie: Sharks in 5.

FreezeMothaSucka: Sharks in 4.

Hardie: Sharks in 4.

Tommyboii: Sharks in 4.

ThaFoSix: Knights in 7.

Edmonton Oilers (25-16-4) vs Seattle Kraken (17-25-3).

Season Series: Oilers (4-2-0) Kraken (2-4-0).

Series X-Factors: EDM: xBeanZy- (81pts) SEA: Blade0Muffin (75.40SV%).

Players to keep an eye on:

EDM: Ustoopid, Someonestopmepls, Semple19, BejimoSzn.

SEA: FreezeMothaSucka, Spelliscy_21, iearntofiy, NowYoDead.

randymarsh2012: The Kraken have their hands full with these Oilers with the talent they have in their starting 6 as well as the depth in their roster. The Kraken have proven they can beat the Oilers but when playoff hockey comes around it’s a whole different ball game. Kraken will need to stay more disciplined than they have during the regular season because these Oilers will make them pay for it. If the Oilers take these guys lightly, they will find themselves in some trouble though. Blade0Muffin has proven time and time again that he’s a tough goalie to score on. If Edmonton falls behind in the score it won’t be an easy hole to climb out of.

Edmonton in 5.

Dirty-Dietrich: Seattle surprised a lot of people and took the third spot in the Western conference, but they now must prepare for a series with one of the league’s most dangerous teams in Edmonton. The Kraken relied on consistency, tenacity, and contributions from their two best players in Freeze and Blade, but their feel-good story will not match up to the sheer amount of talent that Edmonton has on their roster. I feel like Blade will steal a game for the Kraken this series, but his counterpart between the pipes in Clark will pick up 4 wins in a relatively easy series for the Oilers.

Edmonton in 5.

Fluri37: Oilers in 5.

Hughsy28: Oilers in 5.

CClarke: Oilers in 5 – “Hi Mom, Dad, and Randy as well, and I love Jacob Dietrich”.

YoJonsn: Oilers in 6.

WheelChairDevon: Oilers in 6.

Cpenn: Oilers in 4.

KidMoney: Oilers in 5.

Fishhure: Oilers in 5.

Polar1387: Oilers 5.

El_Rookie: Oilers in 5.

FreezeMothaSucka: Oilers in 5.

Hardie: Oilers in 4.

Tommyboii: Oilers in 4.

ThaFoSix: Oilers in 6 – “Clarke will carry”.

Detroit Red Wings (33-9-3) vs Montreal Canadiens (19-26-0)

Season Series: Wings (5-1-0) Habs (1-5-0)

Series X-Factors: DET: Hxrdie- (146pts) MTL: Reapz (79pts)

Players to keep an eye on:

DET: Hypeyy, KyleJ83, Chadkillz134, SelkeTommygoat.

MTL: LeCupidon, Chief2step, Kidmoney, Brazghostt.

randymarsh2012: Red Wings suck, Hardie sucks, Habs in 4.

…That’s what I wish I could say, but these Red Wings are no joke, they’ve dominated all season and will look to continue that into the playoffs. The Red Wings have a deep roster and will be a near impossible hill for Montreal to climb. 

Montreal has done very well of playing the upset card in seasons past, the combination of Reapz and LeCupidon cannot be underestimated. Having said that, it looks like they’ll need a miracle from Brazghostt if they want to beat these guys and I’m not sure how many miracles the former Vezina winner has left in him. 

Detroit in 5.

Dirty-Dietrich: In a rematch from the first round of last season, chadkillz134 and Reapz2313 find themselves preparing for seven games against each other. Montreal has chemistry on their side, as Kidmon3y, LeCupidon, and Reapz know each other like the back of their hand. However, this is Detroit’s series to lose, hell, even conference to lose. Hxrdie-, hypeyy-, and chadkillz are a line that overwhelmed defenses this season, and given the instability of the Canadien’s defensive core, that’s not going to change anytime soon. Nonetheless, I saw this Montreal team take the Eastern conference champions to 7 games last season, so I’ll give them a couple close wins.

Detroit in 6. 

Fluri37: Wings in 4.

Hughsy28: Wings in 6.

CClarke: Wings in 5.

YoJonsn: Wings in 5.

WheelChairDevon: Wings in 5.

Cpenn: Wings in 4.

KidMoney: Canadiens in 7.

Fishhure: Wings in 5.

Polar1387: Wings in 5.

El_Rookie: Wings in 4.

FreezeMothaSucka: Wings in 6.

Hardie: Wings in 5.

Tommyboii: Wings in 5.

ThaFoSix: Wings “In a not so close” 5.

Washington Capitals (29-15-1) vs Toronto Maple Leafs (25-17-3)

Season Series: Caps (4-2-1) Leafs (3-3-1) *1 FF Win for Toronto.

Series X-Factors: WSH: Fluri37 (96pts) TOR: YoJonsn (65pts).

Players to keep an eye on: 

WSH: ProdigyToLegend, Wardo_05, Goalieman92, ll-Dustin-ll.

TOR: KarlssonisGod, Jcpens22, LilChappy, Sorokinl30l.

randymarsh2012: This series will be the most interesting of all 4 of the first round. Washington powered their way up to 2nd in the Standings after being 3rd most of the season. Toronto was dominant to start the season but trailed off near the end giving up that 2nd spot and falling to 3rd. 

Washington’s strength is their offensive core, while Toronto has been one of the best defensive teams this season. This series will come down to whether Toronto’s offense can start clicking and get some pucks in the net or will Washington’s offense be too overwhelming for this Leafs squad. These guys played twice at the end of the season with Washington winning both to secure that 2nd place finish. Were those games a huge tell on how the series will play out? Washington to me is the favorite in this series.

Washington in 6.

Dirty-Dietrich: The Leafs fell off a cliff in the last few weeks of the season, with some personnel issues and poor performances taking home ice advantage away from them this series. Meanwhile, the Capitals caught fire and decimated the Leafs in the final two games of the season, which many thought would be indicative of the upcoming series. However, the Leafs are a scrappy team that plays defense first, and as the old adage goes, defense wins championships. Will that defense be enough to shut down a surging Capitals team? This author is a bit biased, so I’ll say yes, but I’ll say that it might be one of the toughest series I’ll ever have played in. Eggman, getcho skates on and get on the ice.

Toronto in 6.

Fluri37: Caps in 5.

Hughsy28: Caps in 6.

CClarke: Leafs in 6.

YoJonsn: Leafs in 4.

WheelChairDevon: Leafs in 7.

Cpenn: Caps in 4.

KidMoney: Caps in 6.

Fishhure: Caps in 6.

Polar1387: Caps in 6.

El_Rookie: Caps in 6.

FreezeMothaSucka: Caps in 6.

Hardie: Caps in 6.

Tommyboii: Caps in 6.

ThaFoSix: Caps in a “hard fought” 6.

Well, the time is almost upon us; there are a little more than 24 hours until 4 respective game ones are played to kick the SPNHL playoffs off. In the meantime, players need to keep their cool, get their thumbs in check, and maybe detox a bit after a hot, humid weekend in which copious amounts of alcohol were consumed. There’s gonna be some gritty hockey played over the course of this week, and for four teams, for the weeks to come. As somebody who has (somehow) won cups in multiple leagues, my advice is simple: keep moving the rock, keep it out of your zone, and keep your head up. You win these next four games, and you’re a third of the way there.

Despite my adding my part and posting it quite late, we were still able to get this out to you and it’s all because of Randall’s hard work. You can check it out on the website where he broke down the end of the regular season in three fantastic, deep articles. The guy has been busting his tail and deserves a massive amount of credit for his hard work this season; as do Pliskin and Cuban for the SPNHL Podcast. Despite facing challenges on a daily basis all season, those two still got together and made sure we had content for all of our ears to enjoy. 

Good luck this week, everybody! 

SPNHL Media Correspondents Extraordinaire,

Dirty-Dietrich & randymarsh2012