Hello everyone it’s your most beloved player in SPNHL history LispDoge. I wanna start off by saying thanks to all the players/owners/media who helped this season go underway, and want to give a shoutout to JonTurner. Thanks for putting up with that dreadful draft after Round 8, because holy crap it felt like it took forever. Anyways I went ahead and made a pre week 1 PowerRanking, don’t be butthurt over any of the rankings. Ya’ll have the chance to prove your ranking wrong starting Tuesday. Let’s get into it!
- Starting off with the Flyers led by the man the myth the legend, Billyg7718! Joking, Led by Hughsy, we have them coming in at number 1; mainly because they have the best defensive pair in the league. With Kylej and Hughsy, it’s going to be a tough time keeping it down in their zone as they both can do quick breakouts up the ice, and with the talented forwards they have in xFIow, Jcpens, and at late steal they took Hedlessjem, whose a great SP center man. Only problem with this team is their cap space, but hughsy is smart enough as the past 3+ season reining Stanley Cup Winner to fix that issue.
Grading:
FWD- B+
DEF- A
G- B
Overall – A-
- At number two we have ustoopid leading the Devils, the reason I have this team placed higher than the next two is mainly to do with the chem from the left side with Semple and Ustoopid. On top of that you have a great player in John_dean who can play the C position as well on a defensive level. This is going to be another team to beat in the league, as they also have a strong goalie in Blade0muffin, as well as they still have a salary cap to improve this team even better if they so need.
Grading:
FWD- A-
DEF- B
G- B-
Overall- B+
- At number 3, which this probably will be controversial to SP life time players, the St Louis Blues, run by LispDoge the doofus himself. The players in his squad might confuse a lot of veterans over here, but if you know them for other certain leagues you know that these are pretty competent strong players. With plenty of offensive talent who can play the Defence position pretty well, and with LispDoge being pretty much their worst player expect this team to be around the top 4 all season, unless his players end up egoing him.
Grading:
FWD- A
DEF- B+
G- B+
Overall- B+
- Sitting in at the 4 spot we have the Ducks, run by Mr.Eggman himself. Eggman surprised me quite a bit with his selections. He picked a good G7 Lineup with Bradeii running the LW, sniiider at RW, Jhursi at Center, and mids at LD. It seems as it will be another competitive team for this upcoming season, but lets hope everything goes well for him!
Grading:
FWD- B+
DEF- B
G- B-
Overall- B
- At 5 we have the Gutless Sharks, bringing back his old goalie tandem from last season. They will be without Fish and Bxrt this season so we’ll see how this has the effect on the team. They have Good solid Forward presence, but their Defense seems to be pretty shaky once again. Easily will be a playoff spot team, but I don’t see them at this minute winning it all. Also Goodluck with availability from N3wtown that 3 a week is going to hurt him in the process.
Grading:
FWD- B+
DEF- B-
G- B+
Overall- B
- At 6 we have a surprise Devon! He made a semi competent team once again. With runner up vezina man himself Jonturner, and hxrdie playing defense this season we’ll see how they fare against top talented teams. That’s a nice strong Lineup you got, can’t wait for you to be roasted by your teammates throughout the season, I want to play a bet for at least 1 week before someone requests a trade. No but seriously Devon, don’t gift wrap any players to any teams, unless you get something of value in return :).
Grading:
FWD- B-
DEF- B
G- B-
Overall- B
- In at 7 we got the Coyotes led by Chico, honestly I know this team will be a contender, but I have them ranked low, because he took the player I wanted that would’ve completed my team of people I had in mind to draft. No but seriously, good job chico, I knew it would be good offensively, my only question is where the hell is your defense. Jewell is a troll. But I know the forwards will be a problem for teams here! Also a good take on Chadkillz solid goalie there.
Grading:
FWD- A-
DEF- C+
G- B
Overall- B
- At 8, we got the Colorado Avalanche, I can’t wait to watch Bxrt and Karlssonisgod heat up this season. One guy is a troll, the other doesn’t know the R2 button. Still a solid team, I see you being the team that competes for the playoff spot itself, mainly due to cap space, and the lack of solid defenseman. Goodluck this season scrub! (Plisk Edit: do we still use the word scrub?)
Grading:
FWD- B+
DEF- C
G- C
Overall- C+
- Here we go last 4 teams ranked on my list. At 9 we got the Panthers led by PEACEKEEPER500 himself. How do you beg for owning a team and you draft Miss Rogue as your best Skater/Goalie. Jokes, Your team isn’t terrible it just lacks Top Wingers, and also Defenseman, I believe you’ll fix it up considering I stole Clampse from you, but I have a feeling you might sneak in the last playoff spot. Honestly good luck!
FWD- B-
DEF- C-
G- B
Overall C+
- At 10 we have the Predators. I honestly don’t know what to say about this team, from the start I had a feeling you’d pick hyper, but to take fishhure on the same team… If you payed attention in general chat you’d see those guys can’t create chemistry, and the fact you have PGH as your best Left Defense, shows your team has no shot the way it is to make playoffs. Once again, I don’t wish for any non competitive teams, so maybe you’ll prove me wrong, but I gotta see it to believe it.
FWD- B-
DEF- D+
G- B-
Overall C
- Here we go the last two, starting with The Penguins at 11! Somehow you didn’t make the worst team on paper, but the second worst! Congrats on drafting a Goalie in the 2nd round, and a Mid Level RD on the first. You played yourself. I’ll be honest you would’ve been better off trading your first pick away like St. Louis because no one was touching Shayne until most likely the 3rd round. He’s a good player, but not worth the first rounder. Alltro I think you’re a good guy, and you got the cap space to add some talent. I’m hopeful to see you make some changes that will make you a competitor.
FWD- WHO?
DEF- C+
G- C+
Overall C-
- In the Preseason Power Rankings, coming in at the 12th spot is the New York Islanders. Everything Started great with the Draft. From Doranz, than Aali, I figured after our talk you were going to build a great team, but then you memed me, and everyone by taking clark with your next pick in the 6th round and then Jmm. How did you manage to go over cap still when you legit picked late rounds only! Anyways you’re a good dude, I really want you to succeed and make the playoffs over the other bottom 4 teams. So Play your heart outs Islanders!
FWD- C
DEF- D
G- B+
Overall D+
I wish everyone good luck in the upcoming season! Once again don’t be offended by this as it is my intrusive thoughts taking over.
-DogeLisp