(Pliskin editorial note:) i almost didn’t post this one… but it was entertaining enough to warrant it. so again… read with the idea of humor in mind or your really not gonna wanna finish it..
 
FROM THE DYNASTY, TO THE REVERSE SWEEP
by Mclub.
Please remember while reading this that this is a work of satire with a pinch of frustration.
 
Wow talk about the biggest upset in SP history. I was planning on just covering the finals for the NYR in this write up but then I though why not just cover their entire season from day 1.
 
First lets talk about the making of this so called “NYR dynasty” that was full of cocky over confident players (Myself probably being on top of that list)  that choked in the finals harder than the GSW. Lets do this by going all the way back to the draft. The rangers used their #3 overall pick to draft Stiivii, (P.S Cuban stop pronouncing it wrong, Stiivii doesn’t like it, he wrote it like that because he sucks at English) many people were shocked by this move since he was a rookie, but for those who know him, Stiivii is arguably a top 10 dman on PS4 and has a very high profile on LG, he has one of the best offensive games and is very solid defensively…when he’s actually there, but that was the wrong draft choice we should taken GOAT tree-of-life at #3. The rangers then drafted mjvoel who is a great LW when he doesn’t miss his one timers after I feed him a perfect pass. And Mg who is another great RW and scored like 95% of NYR goals in the first 15 games of the season only to lose to Boston in game 1 and never playing again for some reason. He was going to play in the finals but rented some cheap ass motel with garbage internet.
Now let’s talk about the player the rangers already had on their roster that included another rookie known as Mxster-77 who is probably the most reliable defensemen I have ever played with, can shut down some of the best forwards in the game. He is the go to breakout guy when we play club against top clubs as he is able to carry the puck past blue-line to blue-line, but for some reason coughs it up at the first blue line when we play versus shitty teams. Ransom, the mastermind behind this dynasty, he is able to hold the puck forever in the offensive zone and find the open man for the 1timer, he also has one of the most effective wrap around’s i have seen. He was the top forward on the rangers and also played LD quite a bit.
On defence he thought he was Bobby Orr/Erik Karlson, holding on to the puck in the offensive zone last man back, looking for that one timer only to give the other team a breakaway 50% of the time. Kozmo was my favorite owner I ever played for in all the league teams ive been in. We fucked him over by putting him on LD in game 4 because we thought we were that good. But that wasn’t even the original plan, We planned to go Mx/Kozmo/Stivii   Ransom/Mclub(me)  Breezy. We played club with that line hours before the game with Tsibbs in net and it was so aids we decided to just go back to the original line-up, but Breezy refused to play anything but goalie and Kozmo got screwed over as he turned the puck over like 50 times and got walked by their RW like 17 times, but I will talk about that later on in this write up.
Time for the trades NYR made by becoming the worst dynasty of all time. They first did that by trading for Mclub326 (Me), who kinda team tampered his way to the NYR (Hehe..). Mclub thinks he can deke any dman in this league only to get 20+ turnovers a game while succeeding once. He dives every time he makes a beautiful pass to a teammate only for the teammate to miss the one-timer**Stiivii, Mj, Ransom**. And also tried doing the spin-o-rama wrap that he knows barely works in NHL 18 but tries it anyways and I’m pretty sure ransom hates every time I do it. They then got Voltage who has some of the sickest saucer passes I’ve seen and can undress some defensemen, the only time he turns it over is when ransom gives him a suicide pass.
Voltage also loves the penalty box as he probably took more penalties in the playoffs than the entire NYR did in the regular season. Finally the acquisition of Breezy, I never knew the islanders gm was the real life Peter Chiarrelli of the Edmonton Oilers. SeedforTavaras just sent his homeboy to the best team in the league because he knew his team wasn’t getting anywhere (Why cant I have friends like that Breezy). Breezy is another top dman on PS4, he has the offensive capabilities and turned into the Stiivii of the playoffs by averages something like 2.5 pts/game in playoffs on defense. He is a great player when he doesn’t go for dumb hits forcing me to cover for him all the time.
Now the playoffs, we all had hopes of going 12-0 in the playoffs but after we lost the first game we said fk it, and started having some fun. We beat Boston 4-1 and went over to the NJD, we went up 3-0 and were about to sweep the series until Stiivii said “Yo esti lets go enforcer tbnk” and me and ransom being the ideal guys go enforcer with stivii to have a full on enforcer line, that lost the first game of the series. We went back to the original lines in game 5 and won the series.
 
NOW THE FINALS
We absolutely destroyed the Chicago blackhawks in the first 3 games. Those games were easier than New Jersey and Boston combined. In all of those games the time on attack was like 9-12 min to 2-3 min. Then it was time for game 4. And they NYR being the cocky overconfident idiots they were thought it would be a good idea to make up a line that had Kozmo playing center. So Mx-Kozmo- Stivii fwds, and Ransom-Mclub on defense with Breezy in goalie. We forced Kozmo into doing it, even though he 100% denied it. That was the original plan along with everyone going on enforcer. But miraculously the NYR actually got on early for the first time to actually practice. We had the same line-up except the elite commentator, aka tsibbs was playing goalie, we played 1 game and soon realized that it wasn’t even going to be fun.
So we went to the original line-up with kozmo in net, but Breezy only brought his goalie equipment to the dressing room, so kozmo got screwed over once again and played LD. In my opinion we may not have dominated game 4 but we absolutely outplayed them, the game could have been 3-0 or 4-0 after the first but this unknown Tree-of-Life goalie comes out of nowhere and absolutely steals the fucking show, as the game went on it was 1-1 in the third with 5 minutes left and I made a beautiful spin pass to Stivii and he actually scored, If he didn’t I would’ve smashed my controller against the screen. So it was 2-1 and the blackhawks came back and tied it up a minute later. Then with 4 seconds left the blackhawks get a shot off on the goalie, and the elite Mclub pokes it into his own net… The NYR lose the game 4. For the rest of the series the Blackhawks Tree-of-Life shut down the door, and the blackhawks started trapping. The greatest strength of the NYR was the greatest weakness, and Chicago probably used it to their advantage without even knowing.
What is our biggest strength? The offence that every single one of our players are able to create, but what happens when that offence isn’t working because of GOAT tree-of-life. They all try to be the hero and start making selfish plays like trying to deke everyone and doing everything themselves. In game 7 this was the case, all of us got sick of each other because we were not able to get any past Tree-of-Life, the NYR were broken apart and we were not using each other, instead we tried to do everything ourselves and the team broke apart. Even though I would say we still outplayed the Blackhawks we somehow lost. *Why couldn’t you just cover the short side kozmo..* Fish and Hardy were great too but I don’t think they were the reason you guys won, Just my opinion. I THINK YOU GUYS WON BECAUSE OF THOSE ARIZONA JERSEYS WTF I swear their rigged, I was gonna choose them too in game 6 but ransom accidentally chose the wrong build and we had to restart everything… This write up is getting pretty long. I just wanna say congrats to the Arizona Coyotes, you guys played great and your Goalie single handedly broke the rangers apart…. With the #1 pick of S27 ________ drafts Tree-of-Life.
Player shoutouts/summaires:
Stiivii: The Rw On Rd/ The guy that cost me over 20 assists this season
Reaper   some other guy! (Pliskin Edit: ) : The guy who thought he was going to go 7 games with the NYR in the finals only to not even make the finals.
Kozmo: The guy who laughed at reaper some other guy! (Pliskin edit:) when he didn’t even make the finals only to lose against the same team after Choking harder in the finals than the 2016 GSW
Tsbibbs: The guy EA needs to replace with Eddie Olcheck
Tyler91seguin91: The guy who had a crazy regular season but couldn’t even do anything against Pittsburgh.
Mclub (Me): The troll that talks a lot and no one likes/ Gets 20+ turnovers every game
Seedoftavaras: The friend everyone wants to have/ The worst SP gm of all time
Cuban: The Dman who had more turnovers vs the Rangers than the # of words that come out of his mouth on his show. (Love your show btw).
SA_PLisskin: The Boss that could probably ban me in SP after this post  (Pliskin edit: Only because you spelt my name wrong…..)
ACK-STonerboy: The guy who changed the jerseys last second to the Arizona Coyotes after kozmo specifically told him to pick the Blackhawks
Tree-of-Life: The GOAT goalie that probably cost over 100$ in controller damages to the NYR.
Mxster: The shutdown dman that can only breakout vs elite teams, while turning it over against weaker teams.
Fishhure: The guy everyone on NYR hates
Ransom: The mastermind of the NYR dynasty that is probably going to get mad at me for this write up./ The guy who gives 5+ breakaways to other team while playing d.
Breezy: The guy that, if only agreed to play Def instead of Goalie in game 4 might actually have a cup.
Benner: The guy that Stiivii doesn’t like
Bi-polar: The guy that came on the show and said his defense was the reason to beat the leafs in the playoffs…only to allow an average of 7 goals a game in the next series.