SPNHL Season 29 Draft
On June 5th, 2018 @ 8pm est. The Sony Playstation Hockey League will conduct their draft.
It is the beginning of the build to the commencement of the season. This is where teams develop their organizational structure and draft players who will fit into that build. This is where blockbuster deals are made to move up in the draft to acquire that one player who could change their season. This is where teams start their quest to the Stanley Cup, or where they start their descent to the bottom of the league.
Some picks turn out to be accurate assessments, like Entry getting drafted by Dallas last season, becoming one of the Four Horsemen and winning the Norris trophy. Some picks turn out to be the opposite, like Stonerboy getting drafted first overall and falling under 2 points per game after a stellar season 27. Some picks turn to be steals, like Rancher getting drafted in the 5th round and going all the way to win a Stanley Cup.
This draft is just as big for GM’s as it is for players. Before the draft, resigns are made, establishing somewhat of a core for your team. You can focus on goaltending, defense, offense, or a mix of any of those elements. After that, you build the rest of your team. You have to draft smart and prepare yourself for adjustments to your draft strategy in order to be successful in this very important unofficial start to the season.
We will post broadcast information and personnel for the draft shortly, but we hope you will join us as we get ready for another season of the SPNHL!

SPNHL, Season 28: Stanley Cup Final Recap
By Dirty-Dietrich.
“The Cup Finds a Home”.
Going forward, most of the secondary headlines (usually found in quotations) are going to read like a title of an episode of “It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia”.
The draft for Season 28 occurred on March 20th. Two months later, on May 21st, the Stanley Cup finals were contended between the Colorado Avalanche and the Ottawa Senators. In Cuban’s preseason power rankings, he ranked the Avalanche in third, and the Senators in seventh. The Avalanche won the President’s trophy, while the Senators clawed their way into the playoffs as a wild card. You must give Cuban credit; his picks were just about spot on.
Colorado went 8-1 on their way to the finals, defeating a talented Blackhawks squad and sweeping a very dangerous Minnesota unit by using their combo of a great team cycle and an incredible defensive structure. Ottawa swept the Panthers in their wild card series, took the #1 seeded Lightning to 7 games, and swept their regular season kryptonite Pittsburgh in the conference finals. A scrappy offensive core, stellar two way defending, and a solid goaltending trio helped bring the underdog Senators to the finals.
When they got there, they were facing a team who in a combined regular season and playoff record, had lost less than 10 games. The Senators had their work cut out for them, but after an early season struggle and a Cinderella run in the playoffs, Ottawa was not going to let the Avalanche trample on them. Let’s take a look and see how this series turned out, doing it game by game.
GAME 1: Avalanche win 4-1. Series score: 1-0.
Game 1 saw the Colorado squad brutalize the Ottawa team with their great passing and one-timer ability. Boutch put up 2 goals for the Avalanche while Woy would control the ice, dishing out 4 assists in the game. Go_Marc had the lone goal for Ottawa this game, as the Senators hard a hard time getting past the stagnant blue-line defense of the Colorado Avalanche.
GAME 2: Avalanche win 2-1. Series score: 2-0.
In a much closer game than the first, the Avalanche managed to hold off a Sens squad who had adjusted to their playstyle and were playing a more complete defensive game. Woy changed roles this game and put up the only two goals for the Avs, while Go_Marc was once again the goal scorer for the Sens. This was the game that the Sens needed after the big first game loss.
GAME 3: Avalanche win 3-1. Series score: 3-0.
At this point, there was some nervousness on behalf of the Sens. They were playing with a more aggressive side, their forecheck was a lot more prominent, and their offense was high-risk. However, it wasn’t high reward. Go_Marc was the only goal scorer for the Sens, but the Avs had scoring from three different players and were able to step it up and put the pressure on the Sens.
GAME 4: Senators win 4-1. Series score: 3-1.
This game featured two new goal scorers for the Sens in Grammyhands and Dirty-Dietrich, getting two goals and one goal respectively. The Senators’ forecheck was strong and their defensive awareness was heightened, as the only Avalanche scorer was Desy. This was a must win game for the Sens, and they gave Go_Marc a break and helped push elimination back another game.
GAME 5: Senators win 2-1. Series score: 3-2.
Game 5 saw a lot of neutral ice action and a lot of stellar defensive play by both teams, and this game took 5 periods to finish. In the end, Go_Marc made up for the lack of his scoring in the first game, getting the double-overtime winner. Desy scored again for the Avs, but solid goaltending kept the Colorado squad to a single goal again and pushed the series to a game 6.
GAME 6: Avalanche win 2-1. Series score: 4-2.
The ending to game 6 was incredibly dramatic. After Dirty-Dietrich tied the game up in the third with a shorthanded goal to push the game to overtime, the Sens took a bad penalty, and Boutch was sprung on a breakaway upon exiting the box. Boutch went backhand and won the game 2-1 in overtime. In 6 games, the Colorado Avalanche beat the Ottawa Senators to win the Stanley Cup.
In a thrilling 6 game series, there were many notable players per side. For the Avs, Woy and Boutch made big contributions including the series winning goal by the latter and a great first three games by the former that paced the series. For the Sens, Go_Marc had 5 goals in 6 games (the most by any player in the series) and Dirty-Dietrich (don’t give me hell for self-promotion, I played well) had 4 points including a game winning goal and a game tying goal.
As we have reached the conclusion of a great finals, I wanted to take time to congratulate the 2 GM’s who brought their team to the finals. Eggman created a team that believed in a defensive structure that would create opportunities in the offensive zone and they stuck with it all season long. A couple big trades made by Kozmo during the regular season brought in the necessary weapons to turn the Sens from a struggling middle pack squad to a cup contender.
In the end, the Conn Smythe trophy for the most valuable player to their team in the playoffs was Woy. Woy was an offensive force for his team in their monstrous run to the finals, and was the key to victory for the Avalanche in the finals. The only games the Avalanche lost were when he wasn’t on the ice, being not only a great offensive presence for them, but also their lucky charm to an extent. Congratulations to vxWoytkiw8xv for winning the Conn Smythe trophy!
With that, we have reached the end of another fantastic season. There were some great teams assembled this season which lead to the emergence of new stars for the league. The expansion to 18 teams gave new players time to shine and made for some very tight playoff races. Now, we have a little bit of a vacation until we begin Season 29 of the SPNHL. So everybody take their time to rest, but I will leave you with this, a more personal side to these articles.
I wanted to thank everybody in this league. From the stern players to the jokesters, from the GM’s to the players, and from the opponents to the teammates. You all have made me very happy and proud to play in this league, and motivated me to do something to give back. This is why I started writing these articles, and I thank every single one of you from the bottom of my heart for reading these and giving me feedback.
Go dip your feet in the sand, friends. See ya in June.
* DD.

The conclusion of Season 28’s Stanley Cup Finals!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3J6EyADqeso

SPNHL Season 28: Round One Recap/Round Two Preview
By Dirty-Dietrich.
“And then there were four…”
14 teams have fallen. Some of those teams were at the bottom of the standings all season long, and some were riding high going into the playoffs. Anything can happen once the regular season is done, and we were witness to an exciting first round. We saw new stars emerge and some stars fall, so let’s take a closer look at what happened in the first round of the SPNHL Playoffs.
WESTERN CONFERENCE
MATCHUP 1: COLORADO AVALANCHE (1) VS. CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS (4).
VICTORS: COLORADO AVALANCHE.
The Avalanche continued their regular season dominance into the playoffs, defeating the Blackhawks in 5 games. Colorado stayed strong defensively, only allowing 2 goals per game while scoring 3.8 goals per game. Woytkiw was a monster for the Avs, scoring 2 goals per game and putting up 11 points in the series, while also being supported by toslick who accumulated 10 points
MATCHUP 2: DALLAS STARS (2) VS. MINNESOTA WILD (3).
VICTORS: MINNESOTA WILD.
Very few people expected the Four Horsemen to get swept, but the Wild came to this series with all guns blazing. After a modest regular season performance, Minnesota exploded with offense in their first round matchup. The Four Horsemen were shut down and HartySauce and Sudzy had an offensive explosion, each averaging 4 points or more per game.
EASTERN CONFERENCE
MATCHUP 1: TAMPA BAY LIGHTNING (1) VS. OTTAWA SENATORS (4).
VICTORY: OTTAWA SENATORS.
The Bolts and the Sens were the only teams to play 7 games in the first round, but it was the Senators who got the advantage in the end. The Senators capitalized on their power play opportunities and killed off penalties at an exceptional rate, which was a big contributor to their success. Add in phenomenal goaltending, and Ottawa was able to squeak out a very tight series with a game 7 victory.
MATCHUP 2: NEW YORK ISLANDERS (2) VS. PITTSBURGH PENGUINS (3).
VICTORS: PITTSBURGH PENGUINS.
The Islanders had all the weapons up front that they needed, but the Penguins stayed true to their form and played a solid defensive game. The Penguins allowed only 2 goals per game, while scoring 3.2 goals per game. Their penalty kill was sensational at 88.9%, and big offensive contributions from Jayscott and Ajax were instrumental in a 4-1 Pittsburgh series victory.
Looking back at the first round, it was hard to predict many of the series. Every team that made it into these playoffs had a legitimate chance to make it to the next round. I want to congratulate Dallas, Chicago, New York, and (blank) for a hell of a season. However, we still have 3 series left to go. Let’s take a look at what should be two very exciting Conference finals.
WESTERN CONFERENCE FINALS:
COLORADO AVALANCHE (1) VS. MINNESOTA WILD (3).
Minnesota was expected to do well at the beginning of the season, but it seemed like they were on the wrong path. Having rerouted their progress, the Wild find themselves in the conference finals against the President’s Trophy winning Colorado Avalanche. This matchup is a clash of styles to a tee, so let’s take a look at each team’s arsenal and their keys to success (cue DJ Khaled).
COLORADO AVALANCHE:
Woytkiw and Toslick shined in the first round for the Avs, but their forward core is incredibly deep and includes Stamkos, Boutch, and poitraz. Eggman and Sedinpower are an incredibly effective defense tandm who can contribute at both end of the ice, and with Rancher playing lights out like he has all season long, Colorado has all the tools to make it to the cup.
If the Avalanche want to win, they need to maintain that structure that they have all season long. This will not be an easy series for either team, but if Colorado sticks to their defensive guns, it might be easier for them.
MINNESOTA WILD:
HartySauce and Sudzy lit it up in the first round for the Wild, but Arrowhunter and Fivestar each played great supporting roles to a dangerous duo. Tommyboii and Onetimer shut it down on D, rounding out a solid group of skaters. With goalieman taking care of business between the pipes, and Minnesota may have a squad worthy of contending for the cup.
If the Wild want to win, their offense is going to need to be at the top of their game. If they can utilize their speed and creativity to break past a stagnant Avalanche defense as often as they can, they will ensure a victory in the series.
EASTERN CONFERENCE FINALS
PITTSBURGH PENGUINS (3) VS. OTTAWA SENATORS (4).
It’s a battle of the underdogs! The latter-seeded teams both won their first-round matchups. With the Penguins dominating the Islanders in 4 games and the Senators grinding out the Lightning in 7 games, we have a tale of two very different paths to these finals, and a battle of two teams at opposite ends of the spectrum: a defensive juggernaut and a scrappy offensive unit.
PITTSBURGH PENGUINS:
The Penguins were lead by Jayscott, Capone, dufresne, and dominado upfront, shutting down most of the offense at the centre ice. With Gonzo and Ajax putting in great work at D., and Vezina-winner Speedyturtle doing the netminding, the Penguins have a chance to right the wrongs from last season’s Stanley Cup final and bring the cup back to the Burgh,
If the Penguins want to win, they need to contain the Sens. Ottawa has a very dynamic squad, so a hard forecheck and good in zone positioning will be key to creating turnovers and scoring chances. Play like that, and the Pens will win.
OTTAWA SENATORS:
5 different forwards contributed for the Sens in the first round: Marc, Ransom, Grammy, Muse, and Dirty-D (bay-bee). Their depth up front is matched with Fox and Noto’s solid defensive ability, as well as a trio of highly-capable goaltending with Shadow, Kozmo, and Kamakaze. Kozmo took a team to the finals two seasons ago and will be looking to do the same with this squad.
If the Senators want to win, they need to wear down the Pens. Make them work hard to get the puck away from them and take advantage of a physically and mentally fatigued team. Accomplish this, and Ottawa will win the East.
As we enter the last two weeks of the season, we will see a level of competition unprecedented over the course of the past two months. The goals will be more spectacular, the hits will be bigger, and the saves will be more desperate. There will be elating wins, heartbreaking losses, and at the end of this week, two teams will emerge with a 50/50 chance to be the SPNHL Season 28 Champions.
Best of luck to all involved!
Dirty-Dietrich.

SPNHL Season 28: Playoff Preview
By: Dirty-Dietrich
“It’s the most wonderful time of the year…”
As the NHL has 8 remaining teams fighting for the Stanley Cup, the SPNHL is in a similar position. Our seasons are a bit shorter than the NHL (45 games in 5 weeks), but just as grueling and just as competitive. This season was nothing short of spectacular, with 18 teams vying for the title of the best team in the league. Now, we have 8 teams left. Let’s take a look at the teams and the first-round matchups of the 28th installment of the SPNHL playoffs.
WESTERN CONFERENCE
SEED 1: COLORADO AVALANCHE.
Colorado ran away with the Western conference this season, posting an insane 30+ game win streak and one of the best records in the past few seasons, collecting 80 of a possible 90 points. They controlled the ice and had the largest goal differential in the league at a whopping 87. Eggman built a fantastic team with himself and Sedinpower at D, a forward core lead by toslick, Stamkos, and Desy, and solid backstopping by Rancher. The Avalanche have been merely unstoppable all season, but will that continue in the playoffs?
SEED 2: DALLAS STARS.
“WILDCARD, BITCHES!”. Dallas had the second-best record in the Western Conference with 68 points, they just had the mighty Avalanche in the same division. The Stars won their wildcard series against Vegas three games to one and are a very dangerous team. Having the 3 top scorers in the league in Mjvoel, Diirty-triix, and sfic is already a scary lineup, but when you throw in standout defenseman Entry into the mix, the lineup becomes lethal. With goaltending being handled by Bipolorbear and Duges, and the Stars could be in for a deep playoff run.
SEED 3: MINNESOTA WILD.
Finishing third in the conference with 63 points, Minnesota posted a respectable record amongst high expectations. Having 3 drafts picks in the first round, the Wild drafted well and balanced their attack at both ends of the ice. With a top forward line of Sudzy, Hartysauce, and Arrowhunter, GM Tommyboi handling most of the defensive duties, and Goalieman minding the net, Minnesota have all the tools they need to make this postseason… wait for it…
Wild. (I’ll see myself out)
SEED 4: CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS.
Rookie GM Hyper had a tumultuous start to the season but guided the Blackhawks to a stellar turnaround resulting in a 59-point season and a division victory against a usually dominant Anaheim team, keeping the former Stanley Cup finalist duo Reaper & Kidmoney out of the playoffs. Offensively, Hyper is joined by Tread and MG, forming a dangerous top line (when Hyper passes). With a defensive pairing of Bergysdeke and NowYoDead and an elite goaltender in kudlacik, Chicago has what it takes to get it done at both ends of the ice. Can they complete the turnaround and compete for the cup?
WESTERN CONFERENCE
MATCHUP 1: COLORADO AVALANCHE (1) vs. CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS (4).
This will be a great challenge for Colorado, facing off against an offensively strong Chicago team. Chicago has the highest scorer outside of Dallas this season in Hyper, but has the tools necessary to shut him and his line down. It’s also a battle of two of the best goalies in this past season, as Rancher has been a monster for the Avalanche and Kudlacik has been the Blackhawks unsung hero.
If the Avalanche want to win, they need to stay aware of positioning. They have excelled in that department all season, but need to be extra tight against a very dynamic Chicago offense. Stick to the assignment and make them take risks, and the series goes to the Avs.
If the Blackhawks want to win, they will have to dig deep and. This is an incredibly solid defensive unit they are up against, but not one that is perfect. They need to utilize their skill and the variety of offensive weapons in their arsenal, and doing so will get them a victory in this series.
MATCHUP 2: DALLAS STARS (2) vs. MINNESOTA WILD (3).
The Dallas 4 (how about we call them the Four Horsemen?) of Mjvoel, Diirty-Triix, sfic, and Entry are going to be in for a tough series against against a solid Minnesota squad. The Stars have the offensive advantage against the Wild, but they will have to play just as well in their own zone to counter the skill of Harty and Sudzy. Minnesota has more consistent goaltending, which could play a big factor in this series and give them the edge.
If the Stars want to win, they will have to keep up that torrid scoring pace they had all season. It may be easier said than done against a solid Minnesota squad. Find the lanes into the zone and find the holes in Goalieman, and they’ll be moving on.
If the Wild want to win, they will have to play their best 7 games they have all season. They have the skill to shut a dangerous Dallas team down, and with a strong defensive mindset and a gritty, physical performance, they’ll send Chicago golfing.
EASTERN CONFERENCE
SEED 1: TAMPA BAY LIGHTNING.
Tampa Bay won the Eastern Conference this season and posted the second-best record in the league with 71 points. They posted an 11 game win streak to finish the season, so they are blasting Metallica heading into these playoffs and riding the Lightning momentum (sorry). Posting two 50-goal scorers on their top line in Truelegend and kinglyme rounded out by redflag, the Bolts have a great offensive presence. Having Louiedeuce taking care of defense and the duo of VinceT and pemm minding the cage, Tampa is prepared for a deep playoff run.
Seed 2: NEW YORK ISLANDERS.
The Eastern Conference was super-competitive this season, with the race for a playoff sport basically dead-even until the last two weeks. The Islanders were able to pull ahead of the Leafs and win their division with 61 points, thanks to some exceptional play late in the season. The always dangerous duo of Seguin and Benn was complimented by a mid-season draft for #1 draft pick Stonerboy, and a shut down defensive tandem of Breezy and jielking round out a solid core of skaters. Soulpane and zaftigstan provide great goaltending for a great Islanders team who look ready to bring a cup home.
SEED 3: PITTSBURGH PENGUINS.
The Penguins had a respectable season finishing with 60 points, thanks in part to their exceptional special teams play. Killing off 84.6% of penalties and capitalizing on 28.4% of powerplay opportunities, Pittsburgh was a force to be reckoned with. GM Jayscott assembled a great defensive forward core being lead by Capone and Dominado, and Ajax towing the defensive line added to their play style. Lights out goaltending by speedyturtle and DevinDags may be the last piece in the puzzle, with the image being a stellar playoff squad with great capabilities.
SEED 4: OTTAWA SENATORS.
KOZMO turned his Ottawa team around by trading for Go_marc halfway through the season. The Senators were a mediocre team before that, but Marc’s 107-point performance helped get the Senators into a playoff spot and beat the Panthers in three straight games in their wildcard series. Marc’s main line was filled out by the high-scoring rookie Grammyhands and anchored at C by (your’s truly) Dirty-Dietrich. With foxpresentation and Notorious250 handling the bulk of defensive
duties in front of brodtshadow and Kozmo, the Senators are looking to capitalize on a great trade and take a solid squad deep into the playoffs.
MATCHUP 1: TAMPA BAY LIGHTNING (1) vs. OTTAWA SENATORS (4).
This first round matchup is a battle of two high-scoring teams with two 100 + point players. Tampa Bay has the special teams advantage in this series, but Ottawa has a deeper forward core and more weapons at their disposal. The difference is going to be defensive performance, as Louie and fox are both great defenceman who have the ability to drastically change the game.
If the Lightning want to win, they need to turn it up to 11 and pressure the Sens. Force the Senators to make bad passes and capitalize on turnovers, and the Lightning will have the series in the bag.
If the Senators want to win, they need to get creative in both zones. The Bolts are a very dangerous team, so containing them is a must. They must utilize all passing lanes in the offensive zone and cut off Tampa’s breakouts at center ice.
MATCHUP 2: NEW YORK ISLANDERS (2) vs. PITTSBURGH PENGUINS (3).
New York was one of the highest scoring teams in the conference, and Pittsburgh allowed the least goals of any teams in the conference. This series is going to be another clash of styles that requires some really smart hockey on both ends of the ice. A lot of this series will be played in the neutral zone, and whoever controls this zone will win the series.
If the Islanders want to win, they need to strike early and fast. With a dangerous top line, they need to make their presence felt in the first period with some good shots and a few goals and carry that momentum throughout the game.
If the Penguins want to win, they need to play smart and plan ahead. They need to eliminate the options on the play and force the carrier into a turnover. Cut off the breakouts and counter attack strong, and they’ll take the series.
With the regular season in the books, all the eyes in the league turn to these 8 teams. Some defensive stalwarts, some offensive powerhouses, and some very balanced teams. The first round will be exciting, as anything can happen. Upsets may occur and new stars may emerge, but the only thing guaranteed is this: all these teams will have to be strategic, be skillful, and be passionate if they want to come close to winning the cup.
The best of luck to everybody involved!
Dirty-Dietrich.

Last we left you, the number 28 was significant. Additionally, the entire league was given advice on how to stop that number from growing. Looks like some of you out there listened. The streak ended at 30, with Dallas beating Colorado 4-3 in overtime. Whether or not my advice was meaningful or not, would depend on who you ask. After only losing twice all season, Colorado saw three losses, albeit two of which were in overtime. Still a favorite to win the cup, sometimes a bit of adversity is good before the playoffs begin.
Speaking of playoffs, they are just around the corner. Monday night will be pivotal in the East, deciding which teams will be in and which will be out. The top seeds appear to be set with Tampa Bay, Pittsburgh, and the Islanders clinching. The wildcard series is still up in the air. Florida with 53pts, Ottawa with 48pts and Toronto with 45pts.
In the west the picture is a bit clearer, all that remains is where the pieces will fall. Vegas is chasing Minnesota for the top spot in their division. If Minnesota wins out they clinch. If Vegas wins their first two games, the last game of the season Minnesota vs Vegas will determine who takes the division. Definitely a match up to look toward. Dallas will have a close eye on these two, the loser gets to play a tough Dallas team.
Colorado has the Presidents trophy all locked up. Very strange seeing a streak of 1 next to their names. Still holding on to the best goal differential in the league with +95. Let’s look at some other teams to watch out for going into the playoffs.
Chicago
Has quietly put together a very successful season. Led by iHyPeR_97 they are looking strong going into the playoffs. Currently on a 10 game win streak this team is getting hot at the right time. On defense they look to Bergysdeke and NowYoDead to hold up the back line. Both players are just under a point per game, Bergy being the less aggressive of the two, with 14 PIMs, 19 hits and a -5 on the Giveaway/Takeaway. While NowYoDead, has 37 PIMs in 27gms, 65 Hits and a -49 on the Giveaway/Takeaway. It’s a good balance which is working for Chicago
Up front they have iHyper_97, Mg2452 and CantTreadOnMe. Tread will be excited that he is finally being mentioned in an article. Could this be a trend going forward? Collectively they average 3 points per game. This is a difficult line to play against, they pass well to each other and have good balance. All there can score and setup goals. Dangerous for any team to match up against, the scoring can come from anywhere on the ice.
In net they look to kudlacik1, who has been solid in net for them. Boasting a .850 save percentage with three shutouts on the year. Their backup goaltender is reliable, Soiceyboyz4 has a .742 save percentage in 12 games played.
Dallas
They have been good all year. Unfortunately they are in the same division as Colorado. Up front they pretty much run Mjvoell44, Diirty_Trix_13 and Sfic16 every game. Could this be the reincarnation of the Century line? Each player has over 100 points this season. Each player also has over 50 goals. The scoring from this team has been consistent all year long. I don’t think it will slow down in the playoffs.
On defense, Entry is the cornerstone to the backline. He is averaging 1.7 points per game, has 61 points on the year and is a plus 50. Has to be one of the top contenders for the Norris this year. They rotate five other defensemen in with Ushkilledya being the most frequently used.
In net they use both BipolorBear and duges39. BipolorBear has a .716 save percentage and duges39 has a .704 save percentage. If there is a weakness on this team, it’s their inability to stop pucks. This has been the story all season long. For a team that is going to put up 200 goals, they have giving up 124. Neither goalie has a shutout this season. If they can fix this issue, they have a chance to take home the cup.
Tampa Bay
Another team that feels the same pain as Dallas. They have been just as good as Colorado only dropping nine games in regulation. Currently on an 8 game streak, they are putting together a nice run at the end of the season. Getting hot at this point in the year, is what every team strives for.
Another team that runs a top line up front on most occasions. TrueLegend07, redflag33 and kinglyme89 lead the offense for Tampa Bay. Almost another century line, TrueLegend and kinglyme are the goal scorers with redflag being the setup man. The center should be the focal point of any offense, redflag is proving that to be true, with 64 assists and 57% in the faceoff circle.
On defense they run five different guys on the back line, with LouieDeuce8 and ChiTownMenace leading the defensive corps in games played. Finally, VinceT13 is the starting goaltender on this team with a .781 save percentage and two shutouts this season.
To close out the Week 5 recap let’s look at the League Leaders this season:
Forwards
Name Team Points
Mjvoell44 DAL 132
Diirty_Triix_13 DAL 128
Sfic16 DAL 114
TrueLegend07 TB 112
iHyPeR_97 CHI 112
Defensemen
Name Team Points
II-Entryy-II DAL 61
Sedinpower COL 48
LouieDeuce8 TB 39
Eggman–1 COL 34
Redconcept88 VGK 32
Goaltenders
Name Team Save %
Speedyturtle2017 PIT 0.879
kudlacik1 CHI 0.850
Rancher12345 COL 0.817
Soulplane4 NYI 0.817
chadkillz134 FLA 0.813
Goals
Name Team Goals
Diirty_Triix_13 DAL 57
Sfic16 DAL 54
TrueLegend07 TB 53
kinglyme89 TB 53
Mjvoell44 DAL 51
Hits
Name Team Hits
II-Entryy-II DAL 102
GunzThe4th DET 100
prodigytolegend VGK 95
Dirty-Dietrich OTT 89
TheHaunted29 ANA 84
Everyone enjoy the last night of the season. Thank you all for another successful season, looking forward to the playoffs.

A Guide to the SPNHL Discord
By Dirty-Dietrich.
Prior to the past 2 seasons, much of the league chirping was conducted in a little textbox on the home page of this website. Now, it has been replaced by TITAN (very intimidating name), a widget linking you directly to the SPNHL Discord. The idea was introduced by current Ottawa Senators GM KOZMO (you have to say it loud and surprised, like that episode of Seinfeld where we meet Kramer’s mom) and has been a very effective medium for communication throughout the league. There are different channels where you can view announcements, rules, who to contact, and other information sources. It’s quite the handy system. Good job, KOZMO.
There are multiple admins to the chat other than KOZMO, like big boss Pliskin, the charismatic Cuban (my first GM, much love), and the Reapers (Reap and MrsReap). They take care of issues, introduce new bots (I want my +8ball back), manage rosters, and make announcements. The disciplinary committee of KOZMO (you’re everywhere, jesus), Tread, and Tsibs88 are also active in the Discord chat, handling those who disturb the peace.
Alright, now that we’ve gotten through all the roles and responsibilities of management, let’s get to why you might be here. What happens in this chat on the player’s level? What are some directions you should be taking? Who is Eric Cartman’s Dad? (it’s Iachoku)
First and foremost, the SPNHL Discord is a great way to make your name in this league. You can get your name out there by JUST TALKING TO PEOPLE. Stop being shy and ask questions, like if anybody is holding tryouts prior to the season, if anybody needs one for drops/clubs, or if you wanna play FN with any of the scrubs in this league (all of our cheap asses play it because it’s free).
Making friends in this league starts off the ice, in the Discord players lounge. Respond to memes, chirp with everybody, engage in discussions about stupid shit day in and day out (conspiracy theorists are in abundance in this league). Also, be ready for a lot of guys making sexual advances towards you. There is A LOT of homo-erotic behavior in this league (I see you Tread).
To help make your experience in the SPNHL Discord easier and more enjoyable, I have identified some of the key personalities you will encounter in the chat. Look for the following names and prepare yourself accordingly.
MANAGEMENT:
Pliskin: the big one. A good commissioner for the league, strict when necessary but knows how to have fun. Will rip you apart with words/logic.  (Plisk Edit: I didnt tell him to say that also cheque is in the mail)
KOZMO: Discord admin (“Nazi” in the eyes of some). He’s an asshole, but a respectable one. Don’t piss him off, or you won’t be able to speak/type.
Reaper: Reap is really chill. Chirps once in a while, especially when it’s Brownsville (we’ll get to him later). Great player and a great GM.
DC:
Tread: the unofficial face of the DC A really nice dude but always trying to fuck other dudes. Also likes metal. Bonus points there.
GMs:
RedConcept: man Red is so cool. Really nice guy, conducts himself properly, liked by almost everybody in the league. Like a cool jock.
JamieBenn: out of all the players to name yourself after, why BENN? Maybe he’s the real one, IDK. Solid dude, easy to talk to, great player, SHIT connection.
Eggman: My goodness he puts together a great team season after season. Try to get his attention. You’ll be in the playoffs for sure.
EL-ROOKIE: I played a losing season with El-Rookie and had a blast. Nice dude, a great GM to have if you’re in your first few seasons.
Pistolpete: a nice guy and very by-the-book. If you’re a dickhead, you’ll be given the dickhead and hypothetically get fucked by Pete/the league.
Hyper: a letter and a number, buddy. R2. Incredible player, not too talkative. His on-ice play speaks for itself.
Jayscott: affectionately referred to as “Gayscott”, another Eastern conference powerhouse GM. Not too much interaction, but generally respectful.
Tommyboy: HOW THE FUCK DID THIS GUY GET LIKE 3 PICKS IN THE FIRST ROUND. He doesn’t talk much but is funny as hell when he does.
PLAYERS
KingShadow: THE MEME QUEEN. Really nice dude, posts some funny and fucked up stuff, basically made the DC amend the Discord rules.  THANKS JOHNATHAN!!!!  (Jim jefferies ref click here)
Capone: AKA autistic Crosby, really easy to talk to and a vet of this and multiple leagues. Also not one to piss off. Doooon’t piss this guy off.
Bipolorbear: a shit disturber if there ever was one. Reap’s number one fan. HOW DO YOU SPELL POLAR WRONG? Gets ignored by Benn when asked to play FN.
Iachoku: one of the smartest guys in the league. An essential defenceman, as proven by Cuban’s past 3 seasons. Strong with him, bloody disaster without him.
MG: brother of GunzThe4th and lover of Tread. Maybe. The former is a fact and the latter is all but confirmed. Another goofball but a nice guy.
Jedi: pew pew pew, more like poo poo poo. A victim of the disastrous Season 27 Arizona, solid player who’s catchphrase gets a response from a bot. Nice.
Bergysdeke: this guy may be a next level conspiracy theorist. Maybe not. Cool dude, good player, either really fucked up or a massive troll. Maybe both.
Ransom: yeah this guy is definitely a conspiracy theorist. Guy is the definition of a devil’s advocate, but I give him credit for his free thinking. Good player too.
Gucci_Gui: Ransom’s right hand man. Those guys are lights out together. Pops in randomly, also had shroom and Reese’s pieces milkshake once. What the fuck.
Peacekeeper: IMO one of the more underrated goalies in the league. Poor bastard gets stuck doing night stocking. Better availability = VEZINA.
u_1_2_b_me: GFY. Another guy who had a bot introduced because of his catchphrase. A bit of an annoying prick but hey, welcome to the SPNHL Discord.
Dodgesblueshells: a dear friend of mine but a fucking troll in the chat. Great shut down D, will annoy the shit outta you for days on end, just for fun.
Ciulla: stole last season’s Conn Smythe from Westside. Bastard. Great player, I have no bloody idea how to pronounce his name. CHOOLA?
Toslick: a bit of an arrogant bastard but for good reason. Solid player. Maybe a little to big for his boots, once called “to-sh…” um… never mind.  (plisk Edit: dont think he would approve)
Gonzoarmstrong: I thought his name was a reference to Lance Armstrong’s career. It was a Muppets joke, dumb fuck me. LG big name, a bit of a troll.
Brownsville: universally LOVED by the league it seems. When somebody starts chirping Browns, EVERYBODY starts chirping Browns. It’s a community activity. (Plisk Edit: making friends here)
Seguin: a bit of an asshole. Former Selke trophy winner, but always tells people to KYS. Always tags people and says NOTHING. Kinda weird.
Uberpwned: constantly tagged by/tagging Seguin. Maybe they have an MG and Tread thing going on. This league is turning into a soap opera.
Dirty-D: your’s truly. I yell a lot and say a lot of weird/funny shit. Solid defensive player and I get carried in the offensive zone. Always willing to help you out.
The remainder of the league aren’t as prominent in the chat, but they still pop in there every once in a while. It’s usually people chirping, arguing over whether a game is a forfeit or not, irrelevant players chirping while getting carried, or talking about some weird New World Order philosophies or prophecies. There are some beneficial and rewarding conversations to occur in the chat, though.
My advice to you is simple. Be friendly, be respectful, and have fun. It’s a video game organized in a competitive fashion, but it should never get to the point where you make a god-awful diss track (Vibez and Alonzi, if you’re reading this, what the fuck was that?). Make friends, have a blast, play with new people, learn new things, and last but not least: #DirtyDForSelke. See you on the ice.
* Dirty-Dietrich.